In a universe where socks mysteriously disappear in the laundry and cats are inexplicably convinced they own the house, SkyBridge Capital’s illustrious founder Anthony Scaramucci has decided to grace us with what he calls an “intellectually defensible” bull case for Bitcoin. Yes, folks, you heard it right – Bitcoin, that digital currency which often feels like trying to catch a greased pig at a county fair.
In a dazzling display of social media prowess, he took to X (formerly known as Twitter, or as I like to call it, The Place Where Good Ideas Go to Die) to remind investors of the grand macroeconomic forces at play that will surely catapult this cryptocurrency into the stratosphere of success. Or at least keep it from crashing into the nearest black hole.
The 21st-century store of value
Here’s the crux of it all: the modern world, in all its chaotic glory, requires a new type of money – because clearly, our existing forms of currency weren’t doing enough to perplex us.
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“Bitcoin is a bet that the 21st century will need a neutral, non-sovereign, digitally native store of value,” Scaramucci proclaimed, as if he were announcing the next big hit single from a pop star we’ve never heard of. He added, with all the seriousness of a cat contemplating the meaning of life, “nothing else credibly fills that role.” Well, sure, why not? Let’s just throw caution to the wind and trust the virtual magic beans!
Scaramucci has gracefully divorced this high-flying asset from the clutches of traditional equities or those pesky physical commodities, which are so last century. Being “neutral” and “non-sovereign” means Bitcoin operates outside the control of any single central bank or nation-state, which is about as comforting as a rubber chicken in a room full of serious politicians.
Thanks to its “digitally native” architecture, Bitcoin can zip around the globe at the speed of the internet, sans armoured trucks or the awkwardness of having to interact with a bank teller who seems to think you’re trying to rob them. Scaramucci argues that Bitcoin is the only credible hedge against the looming threats of debt, reckless money printing, AI chaos, and geopolitical shenanigans that could make a soap opera look tame.
Even though Bitcoin is currently playing hide-and-seek below its all-time highs while older institutional money scuttles back to traditional safe havens like gold and silver (because who doesn’t love a shiny rock?), Scaramucci remains unapologetically unfazed by the short-term price fluctuations. “Given the macro trajectory,” he concluded with the confidence of someone about to jump off a cliff while wearing a parachute, “that bet looks more reasonable with each passing year, not less.” Well, isn’t that reassuring!
And in other thrilling news, our dear friend Anthony recently acknowledged that cryptocurrency is indeed in a bear market. He’s now encouraging investors to simply ignore those pesky short-term price drops, much like one might ignore the incessant meowing of a particular feline demanding dinner. Ah, the wisdom of the ages.
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2026-02-23 20:55