70% Bitcoin, 30% Shock: Billionaire’s Wallet Formula Exposes Finance’s Jurassic Park

If you thought your uncle at Thanksgiving was bold with his cranberry sauce investments, you haven’t met Ricardo Salinas. In a recent interview, the billionaire donned his intergalactic investor hat and broadcast to the known universe: “Buy everything that you can”—by which he presumably meant Bitcoin, not the entire contents of your local supermarket. 🛒💸

A 70/30 Portfolio: Bitcoin Over Everything

Salinas, currently one of Latin America’s top contenders in the ‘Who Wants to Escape Fiat?’ Olympics, revealed his portfolio is calibrated for a future ruled by Bitcoin—roughly 70% BTC-related (a.k.a. “all in, but save a little for the gold bugs”) and 30% in gold and, for that prehistoric flair, gold mining stocks.

“I don’t have a single bond,” Salinas admitted, which means he’s apparently immune to every financial advisor’s PowerPoint presentations. “I don’t have any other stocks except my own.” The only thing missing is a Bitcoin hoodie and a pickaxe for the gold mines. 🏆💰

Salinas’ allocation isn’t so much a tiptoe away from traditional finance as an intercontinental ballistic missile. He and a growing club of the ultra-wealthy are jumping into “hard assets” faster than you can say, “quantitative easing sounds like a medieval plague.”

Why Bitcoin Over Gold?

Bitcoin, Salinas argues, is like gold—but with tighter jeans and a fixed supply. You can dig up more gold (about 3% per year, courtesy of the world’s most determined people with shovels), but Bitcoin? There’s only 21 million, period. No Bitcoin elves sneaking out at night to make more.

“It’s the hardest asset in the world. Not even gold is as hard,” bellowed Salinas, presumably while polishing his digital wallet. “Only 1 million Bitcoin left to be mined—and that takes until roughly 2140. By then, we may have colonies on Mars, but probably still no working printer ink subscription.” ⛏️🚀

Long-Term Strategy: Dollar-Cost Averaging

If you’re unnerved by Bitcoin’s performative volatility—one day it’s up, next day it’s impersonating a wounded duck—Salinas prescribes the ancient wisdom of the Dollar-Cost Average. In essence: buy a bit every month, forget about it, and come back in 10 years with a smug smile reserved for people who ignored their cousin’s NFT pitch.

Even after a recent 20% drop post-Trump-rally (a sentence that proves we’re living in the weirdest timeline), Salinas stands firm: Bitcoin is going up over time, thanks to “scarcity, decentralization, and people eventually learning what money actually is.” 📈⏳

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2025-05-04 17:53

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