Crypto news

XRP’s whale behavior, dear reader, has become a farce worthy of Molière. The number of major whale wallets dwindles, yet the survivors hoard their spoils with the fervor of a miser in a fairy tale. A paradox, nay, a riddle wrapped in a conundrum! Santiment’s data reveals a 20.6% drop in 100M+ XRP wallets over eight weeks, with 569 “whales” vanishing like ghosts in a snowstorm. A contraction so sharp, it would make a Russian winter weep. 🌬️

Strategy Inc. unveiled a new USD reserve, a magical potion to keep their financial potions from boiling over. They claim it’s to strengthen their position against the wild, wobbly market winds. 🌪️💰

The data, cruel as winter, reveals a truth: Layer-2 networks now conduct most transactions, leaving Ethereum to stew in its own metaphorical “digital oil.” A fine idea, this “combustion off-chain,” but who ignites the flame? Not the mainnet, it seems. 🔥

The latest report from TheMinerMag grimly describes the situation as miners struggling through the “harshest margin environment of all time.” Hashprice, the amount of revenue earned per unit of computational power, has plummeted from a relatively generous $55 per petahash per second (PH/s) in the third quarter to a modest $35 PH/s – a level so low it’s less of a temporary hiccup and more of a structural problem, they suggest.

XRP has decided to take a nosedive, dropping by 7.62% in the last 24 hours. Because, you know, why not? 🌊⬇️

During an interview on the ‘What Bitcoin Did’ podcast, the Strategy CEO said they could sell Bitcoin to fund dividend payments on their preferred shares if the mNAV is trading below 1. He alluded to the BTC yield, which is their primary KPI, and that under 1x mNAV, it is more “creative” to sell their BTC holdings to pay the dividends. 🤯 The CEO’s words echo the grim arithmetic of survival, where even the most sacred assets are reduced to mere numbers on a screen. 📊

On-chain data has been kind enough to shed some light. Apparently, these gargantuan investors aren’t panicking just yet, but they are certainly being picky about where they lay down their colossal stacks of Bitcoin. Let’s peel back the layers of this mystery, shall we?

According to the whispers of the blockchain, this digital alchemist conjured a near-infinite supply of yETH in a solitary transaction, a feat so audacious it borders on the absurd. With these phantom tokens, they plundered ETH and liquid-staking derivatives from liquidity pools, leaving behind a trail of devastation. The deed was uncovered on November 30, 2025, and the toll stands at a staggering $9 million. 💸🔥

The past few months have been as jolly as a wet weekend for Cardano’s backers. The blasted thing’s valuation is now bobbing about below $0.40, a staggering 60% dip from its mid-September heyday. The market capitalization, once a stout fellow, has shrunk to under $15 billion, making it a bit of a struggle to rejoin the crypto top 10 club. One can almost hear the wails of “I say, steady on!” from the sidelines. 🥴

This new tax plan, backed by the ruling coalition (who probably still don’t know how blockchain works), will treat crypto profits like they’re part of the cool kids’ club-separate from wages and business earnings. The 20% is split between the national government (15%) and regional authorities (5%), because even taxes need a little teamwork. 🥳