PayPal’s stock price exploded in a fiery fiscal kabuki on Tuesday, becoming Wall Street’s biggest punchline after posting numbers so weak they’d make a toddler’s handshake look strong. And don’t even get me started on the leadership shuffle.
- PayPal’s share price continued its death spiral, because nothing says “success” like trading at $42.19 after hitting $300.
- The company revealed financial results so lackluster, they’d make a napkin jealous. Oh, and they fired their CEO-because why not?
- Revenue and profits? Weak. Like a screen door in a hurricane. Or a man trying to open a jar of pickles.
PayPal, the fintech titan now more “tech” than “fin,” is currently trading at a laughable $42.19. That’s right, down from its peak of $300-because apparently, $258 is just pocket change for a company that once had a $386 billion market cap. Now it’s $40 billion, which is about what you’d pay for a yacht if you’re Elon Musk.
The stock’s implosion followed a Q4 report where revenue rose 4% to $8.7 billion. Groundbreaking! Meanwhile, operating income jumped 5% to $1.5 billion. Yes, “jumped” is the technical term for “barely twitched.”
And let’s talk about the future: PayPal expects its growth to slow down like a grandma on a three-day layover. First-quarter EPS guidance? Mid-single-digit declines. Same for the year. Because why aim high when you can aim… lower?
So what’s the fix? A CEO change, of course! Alex Chriss, the man who made “executive shuffle” sound like a dance, was replaced by Enrique Lores, a cowboy from HP. Jamie Miller, the interim CEO, is now tasked with steering the ship-or, as we call it, avoiding the iceberg of existential dread.
“While some progress has been made in a number of areas over the last two years, the pace of change and execution was not in line with the Board’s expectations.” Translation: We’re all terrible at our jobs, but let’s blame the intern.
PayPal’s been under siege from competitors like Klarna, Affirm, and Apple, who’ve been throwing around stablecoins like confetti at a crypto parade. USDT, RLUSD, USDC-they’re all waltzing in and stealing PayPal’s thunder. Oh, and PayPal launched its own stablecoin, PYUSD, which is now worth $3.6 billion. Great! Now they just need to figure out how to monetize it without breaking the law. Good luck with that!
As for the stock’s valuation? It’s trading at a forward P/E of 9.77, which is about half of what the S&P 500 charges for a basic subscription to “not being PayPal.”
PayPal Stock Price Technical Analysis
The weekly chart shows PYPL plummeting from $83.20 to $42, forming patterns so bearish they make a grizzly bear look optimistic. It’s also below all moving averages, and the RSI is falling faster than a man in a rocket-powered lawn chair.
In short, the stock is in freefall, and the only thing left to do is pray that Enrique Lores can work a miracle-or at least a decent PowerPoint presentation.
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2026-02-03 19:44