You’ll Never Guess Why the USA Won’t Go on a Bitcoin Shopping Spree!

On a most peculiar Wednesday, Arthur Hayes—who’s something of a modern-day BFG for Bitcoin—staged his own little interview spectacular. He squinted at America’s crypto closet and declared with a sly grin, “No more Bitcoin shopping sprees for you, Uncle Sam!” 🇺🇸💸

Apparently, the United States is already sitting on a mountain of 198,012 Bitcoins. Imagine a gigantic pile of golden coins, but without the gold and with 98% more internet drama. Altogether, it’s worth more than $18 billion—a sum best counted by chocolate-fingered accountants.

“The US is a deficit country,” sniffed Hayes, mixing sarcasm and a dash of pity. “The only Strategic Reserve we’ll see is them not selling what they already pinched from the baddies!” One can only picture gray-suited officials, sorrowfully polishing confiscated Bitcoins and muttering about missed opportunities.

As for the idea of the U.S. galloping into crypto like a knight in shining armor, Hayes was having none of it. “No politician wants to be seen as a Bitcoin bro,” he quipped. “Unless, of course, the bro code comes with a side of campaign donations.” 😏

And who can forget the recent executive order, hastily scribbled by President Donald Trump? He headed into the Oval Office and crafted himself a shiny Bitcoin reserve—mostly made up of loot pried from the cold, digital hands of internet villains.

To make things extra twisty, Sergej Kunz from 1inch piped up, warning that if America started buying Bitcoin like it was bulk candy at Wonka’s factory, every country would soon storm the store, too. At that point, even Antarctica might try mining from penguin-powered computers.

Meanwhile, Hayes is still convinced that Bitcoin will stay the top dog, staring down all the wannabe altcoins from its digital throne. He predicts another rollicking “altcoin season” may soon be nipping at Bitcoin’s heels, but for now, BTC dominance is rising—currently at 64.78% and climbing, like a beanstalk coated in cryptographic magic. 🪙✨

Read More

• Original The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion Designer Says Bethesda’s Remaster Is So Impressive It Could Be Called ‘Oblivion 2.0’

• Weak Hero Class 1 Ending Explained

• Clash Royale Best Boss Bandit Champion decks

• How To Install Mods For Oblivion Remastered

• HBO shares The Last of Us season 2 release window

• The Last of Us season 2 confirms spring 2025 release on HBO

• Pokémon TCG Pocket announces new Celestial Guardians Expansion along with Half-Year Anniversary events

• Ozzy Osbourne’s Health Update Before Final Black Sabbath Gig

• FC Mobile 25 Hero Chronicles event Guide and Tips

• How to Join the Dark Brotherhood in Oblivion Remastered: Bloodshed Required

2025-05-03 08:21