On a sultry June night, as moonlight danced on the roof of the Central Bank, a certain British analyst known to the world only as CryptoInsightUK peered into XRP’s charts with the melancholy of a Moscow fortune-teller awaiting payday. The verdict? XRP must finish its most important body part: not a leg, not a head, but a particularly elusive right shoulder! Yes, the market’s own Frankenstein is being assembled, and—spoiler alert—it’s out of gym memberships.
“It is dense with liquidity beneath us,” intoned our analyst on YouTube, with all the dramatic tension of a surgeon approaching an appendix—somewhere between $1.92 and $1.80 he suspects a trapdoor straight to financial purgatory. How very literary. Being British, he is sardonic about the inevitability of a “flush,” as though the market were an old samovar ready to belch hot tea at unsuspecting traders.
As of today, XRP lounges at $2.24, about 3% higher—a mere hop from the analyst’s guesstimated descent of 20%. “If we go down first, I can finally sleep,” he sighs, hinting at nights spent haunted by charts, pensioned cats, and visions of $2.42 taunting him like an unpaid tax bill.
There are greater powers in play! Bitcoin dominance, that great bear in the financial circus, looms. Apparently, if The King drops to somewhere between $100,000 and $93,000 (you know, just pocket change) then a true alt-season may erupt, sweeping up XRP with more drama than a Russian wedding. Expect tears, laughter, possibly a fight over leveraged longs.
Meanwhile, after May’s “capitulation candle” (presumably scented “Despair and Margin Calls”), the analyst curses the choppy rebound, lamenting “over-leveraged” traders piling into $2.15–$2.40 like Moscow students before half-price vodka night. Their exuberance must be, in his view, “flushed out.” Toilets feature prominently in his metaphors. Make of that what you will. 🚽
But wait! Zooming out, the analyst’s chart reveals a head-and-shoulders pattern so perfectly symmetrical, even Bulgakov’s Woland would scoff at such order in a world of chaos. Should XRP plunge to $1.88 and rebound upward, then—by some mysterious pattern law—it might soar past $3.50, resurrecting memories from the long-lost year of 2021. A number last seen when people still believed in non-fungible tokens (bless their hearts).
Across the market, tension simmers. Ethereum perpetuals are at record-high open interest. Any sudden drop and—poof!—a forced-liquidation ballet worthy of the Bolshoi, except with less grace and more crying in Discord servers. “These people will be flushed out,” he declares again, threatening mass bathroom breaks across crypto Twitter. 🚻
Yet tucked beneath his British reserve lurks bullish optimism. “We are going significantly higher,” he whispers, clutching gold’s chart in one hand and XRP’s in the other, as though both are tickets to the Bolshoi’s dress circle amid global chaos. “DCA from here,” he proclaims sagely, admitting that 97% of his own rubles (pounds, really) remain stubbornly in the spot market, the other 3% marooned and awaiting rescue near $1.80–$1.92.
Will the right shoulder finally materialize so XRP can launch skyward, or will the market once again pull a Pontius Pilate and simply… wash its hands? In the next episode, expect either euphoria or despair—or, knowing crypto, probably both before sunrise. As of this report, XRP sulks at $2.23. Curtain.

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2025-06-17 18:42