Trump’s Bitcoin Scheme: A New Frontier or Just Another Sale of Snake Oil? 🤔💰

by

Trump’s Bold Leap into Bitcoin: Will He Lead or Just Fumble the Ball? 🧐💸

  • Trump Media Files for a Bitcoin ETF on NYSE—Because Who Doesn’t Love a Good Gamble? 🃏
  • Yorkville America Digital Half-Interested Sponsor—Somewhere Between Heartfelt and Haphazard. 🤷‍♂️

According to a long-winded document that was somehow submitted to the Securities and Exchange Commission, NYSE Arca has decided to throw its hat into the ring of “let’s see what this crazy crypto thing can do.” On June 4, 2025, Trump Media and Technology Group, that lovable band of hucksters, filed for a cryptocurrency exchange license—because, naturally, they’re all about making money—and why not add a little chaos while they’re at it?

The Truth Social Bitcoin ETF (B.T., not to be confused with B.S.) will supposedly follow Bitcoin’s every whim, according to the filing. NYSE Arca used some fancy-sounding Rule 8.201-E, which sounds like a secret handshake, to push this proposal along, all under the big 1934 Act, because regulations are just suggestions, right? 🤔

Most of Trump Media’s shares, which operate Truth Social, are owned by none other than President Donald Trump himself—because who better to run a digital circus than a seasoned showman? The company has already raked in $2.5 billion in private funds, with plans to pour it all into crypto, proving once again that they’re serious about turning dollar bills into digital confetti.

The document, of course, forgets to mention the ticker symbol or what fees might be hiding in the shadows, but it does include some Exhibit 1 about complying with various, no doubt complicated, rule changes—because transparency is overrated.

Crypto Partners to the Rescue—Or Just Adding Fuel to the Fire?

With Crypto.com’s help, Trump Media’s “Truth Fi” subsidiary aims to whip up some exchange-traded funds (ETFs), because nothing screams stability like “trust us, it’s safe.” The Bitcoin held by this ETF will be managed by Foris DAX Trust Company LLC—another subsidiary of Crypto.com, because apparently, everyone’s in on the scam—or just trying to look official. 🤡

The company’s latest toy is Truth.Fi, launched at the dawn of 2025 to help folks handle their crypto stacks, whether they want to buy, sell, or just cheer from the sidelines while hoping their gamble pays off.

By selling 55.9 million shares at $25.72 each, Trump Media managed to wrangle a cool $1.44 billion—enough to buy a small country, or at least a lot of digital coins. They also issued $1 billion in notes—because debt is the new black—due to mature in 2028. All this cash goes straight into the Bitcoin treasury, helping the company play pretend that they’re serious about crypto. 💸

Trump’s Crypto Dreams: Bigger Than the Tower

What does this all mean? Simple: cryptocurrency is now as vital to Trump Media as air—something to breathe out proudly while plotting bigger shams. They boast about their financial muscle and shuck-and-jive relationships, aiming for a major splash in the digital pond. 🐟

By December 2024, Trump Media had amassed a sizable Bitcoin treasury—making them among the biggest fish in the U.S. Bitcoin pond, just behind the government, probably. They see crypto as a sort of armor against the unpredictable storms shaking the banking world—a digital ‘get out of jail free’ card, if you will.

And, of course, Donald Trump himself has been seen publicly throwing his hat into the crypto ring, hosting memecoins like $TRUMP and pushing policies that reckon Bitcoin might someday be part of Uncle Sam’s official balance sheet. Because if you’re going to gamble, might as well go all in, right? 🎲

When spot Bitcoin ETFs launched in January 2024, they swept up over $130 billion—enough cash to buy almost a dozen yachts, or at least a fancy yacht-sized virtual pretzel. The rush from big investors eager to dodge inflation has Trump Media now dancing to the crypto tune.

According to the wise folks at the U.S. SEC, ProShares is trying to make it easier for your friendly neighborhood broker to sell Bitcoin ETFs—so everyone and their grandma can get a piece of this digital pie. 🥧

Read More

2025-06-04 22:29