Trump’s Bitcoin BFF Spends $314M on Mining Gear Amid Tariff Drama 🐘💸

by

Darling, if you thought Bitcoin mining was a quiet hobby, think again. American Bitcoin Corp-yes, the one with Trump’s golden endorsement-just splurged $314 million on 16,299 Bitmain ASICs. Because nothing says “I love America” like importing Chinese hardware while tariffs loom. 🐘💸

The timing? As subtle as a Trump tweet. With U.S. tariffs on Chinese imports about to hit like a rogue tax bill, Bitmain’s “fixed-price deal” is basically crypto’s version of a prenup. “Let’s lock this in before tariffs crash the party,” the industry seems to whisper. 😬

Oh, but let’s not forget the real drama: 99% of Bitcoin mining machines still come from just three Chinese companies (Bitmain, MicroBT, and Canaan). Cue the gasp emoji. 🤯 They’re now debating whether to move production to the U.S.-because nothing says “global stability” like shipping GPUs from Texas. 🚚

Bitmain, the crypto world’s favorite hardware tycoon, plans to open its first U.S. ASIC factory by year’s end. Florida or Texas? Let’s just say their new HQ will be as controversial as a Brexit vote. 😉 And with 82% of the global market, they’re the undisputed king of crypto mining hardware. 👑

The Trump administration’s tariff tango has critics throwing their teacups against the wall. “This’ll price out U.S. miners and leave Bitmain with a warehouse full of unsold dreams,” they moan. But hey, nothing a little capitalist magic can’t fix, right? ✨

As the U.S. crypto industry gears up for a “reshore or perish” showdown, only time will tell if America’s made-in-the-USA mining dream can outshine China’s well-oiled supply chains. Until then, let’s raise a cup of tea to American Bitcoin Corp’s $314 million gamble. 🍵 #CryptoTeatime

Read More

2025-08-15 13:26