Crypto news

Truce, Tariffs, and a Dash of Crypto Drama: You Won’t Believe What Biden and Xi Just Did

BBG News

So, Monday brought the kind of international plot twist usually reserved for the season finale of a political drama that’s been running a little too long. The USA and China—you know, the Ross and Rachel of global commerce—finally decided to chill on the whole tariff war for 90 days. That’s right, they put their tariffs in timeout. Everyone pretended it was totally normal diplomatic behavior rather than two economic juggernauts half-heartedly agreeing to stop stepping on each other’s toes.

What happens when these economic frenemies take a break? The crypto world basically throws itself a party. Bitcoin starts moonwalking toward its all-time high, trading volumes go wild, and everyone’s moving their risk appetite off the kids’ menu. Investors everywhere suddenly want a slice of every hot new pre-sale token that pops up, especially SOLX, because if there’s anything 2024 loves more than a meme coin, it’s a meme coin with an overly complicated backstory involving blockchains that have layers. Like, onions but for nerds.

Source: coinmarketcap.com

The 90-Day Tariff Snooze Button

Who do we thank for this little mid-season detente? Two days of anxiety-inducing negotiations, Swiss-hosted (because you know it’s serious when there’s cheese and yodeling involved), with high-level Americans and Chinese rolling up their sleeves and acting like they aren’t just there for the free Toblerone.

This “I guess we can be adults for three months” deal all started when Donald Trump decided in April to hike up tariffs to what I can only describe as petty-ex territory—think 125% tariffs on Chinese imports. China, not to be outdone, mirrored the move. Now, US tariffs drop from an absurd 145% to 30%, and Chinese ones go from “do we even like you?” 125% down to a totally reasonable 10%.

At the press conference, US Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent basically said, “Everyone played nice by the lake, and now both sides will reduce tariffs by 115 percentage points.” Maybe lake air does for diplomacy what coffee does for my productivity.

Markets heard the word “relax” and instantly threw on their party hats. SPX up 2.50%, Nasdaq up 3.14%, and trading bots everywhere giving each other virtual high-fives.

The Return of Reckless Optimism: Bitcoin Hits the Gym 💪

You put “de-escalation” and “diplomacy” in the global group chat, and suddenly it’s the roaring twenties all over again (minus the speakeasies, unless you count Discord channels).

Bitcoin flexed its muscles on Monday—spiking above $104,000 because nothing says “global stability” like everyone buying a fake coin named after a fruit. Over the past five weeks, Bitcoin hasn’t skipped leg day, climbing 23.55% in a month, leaving fund managers somewhere between “ecstatic” and “terrified.”

(Because what’s a news article without a chart looking like it just saw a ghost?)

But wait, there’s more! Ethereum said, “Hold my smart contract,” spiking 56.2% in a month with a market cap over $309.55 billion. Solana chimed in, “Me too, please!” and jumped 39.4% over the same period, with a hearty 4.7% gain just from this tariff kerfuffle. Basically, “risk off” hasn’t checked its calendar in a while.

Hot new crypto presales are suddenly the cool kids at prom. SOLX is getting so much attention it probably has agents and a skincare routine. Apparently, it stands to benefit most if the hype machine doesn’t run out of fuel.

Solaxy: It’s Not Just a Name, It’s a Vibe 🚀

There’s a new kid on the block(chain), and its name is Solaxy. With an innovative “Layer 2” solution for Solana (because “Layer 1” is so last year), they raised almost $34.9 million—which I’m guessing is either a vote of confidence or a whole bunch of people buying in so they can sound *very* smart at brunch.

Solaxy’s superpower? Smoothing out Solana’s rough edges with a “modular rollup,” which is fancy-speak for “we took your blockchain and put some blockchain on it.” The payoff: faster, cheaper transactions and a developer playground for cooking up all the funky meme coins and deFi shenanigans you can dream up.

Source: solaxy.io

Early birds snag juicy staking rewards—up to 115% APY. (Yes, you read that right. Remember, if it sounds too good to be true, it was probably designed by someone wearing a hoodie at 3 AM.) Current SOLX price: $0.001722. To buy, just connect your Best Wallet (or any other wallet that hasn’t ghosted you yet) and go wild.

Best Wallet: Buy Bitcoin While Reheating Pizza 🍕

Crypto volatility means wallets better keep up. Enter Best Wallet—it says “skip the KYC drama,” lets you buy and manage coins superfast, and comes with mobile apps that even your crypto-curious Grandma could probably use.

Source: bestwallet.com

The wallet’s “presale discovery” section basically throws new coins at you until you cave and buy something. It supports more than 60 blockchains (because someone asked for that, I guess), and you get easy access to all your NFT cats and dApps.

On security: 2FA, PIN, biometrics, and some next-level Fireblocks MPC-CMP tech so fancy, it probably requires an IT certification just to pronounce correctly. Allegedly, it’s the most foolproof way to protect digital assets right now.

So, go ahead: embrace chaos, invest in the meta, and try to keep up—because even global politics can’t out-weird crypto.

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2025-05-13 14:57

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