This Bitcoin Prediction Will Make You Laugh, Cry, or Buy More Crypto—Read On!

Well, will you look at that—Bitcoin has finally remembered its gym membership and done some heavy lifting, smashing right through the $100,000 ceiling like it’s on a reality TV show about outrageous comebacks. 🎉 About time, too. For months, it was the financial equivalent of sitting in joggers eating cheese puffs while everyone yelled, “Do something!”

Enter our ever-reliable hero, Rekt Capital, a crypto analyst with a name that suggests he’s either seen the meaning of life flash before his eyes or spent a bit too long in the meme mines. He’s not here for casual numbers. No, he’s prophesying BIG THINGS. Allegedly, the much-anticipated Four-Year Cycle is back like Fleetwood Mac on a comeback tour, and if the past is anything to go by (always so reliable, right?)—cha-ching, potential profit incoming. 🤑

Anyway, let’s do the time warp and see what’s (allegedly) next on Bitcoin’s wild ride.

Here We Go Again: New Cycle, Who Dis?

According to Rekt Capital (whose tweets have the dramatic gravitas of apocalyptic weather alerts), 2025 is not just another year you’ll forget halfway through. No—2025 is “bull peak” time for Bitcoin. Think of it as that mythical moment when you walk into a party and everyone actually notices. The cycle, he says, is as predictable as your annual existential crisis: huge spike (yay!), soul-crushing drop (hooray?), and, finally, dusting yourself off and pretending you knew it would all work out.

So basically, breaking $100K wasn’t just Bitcoin showing off—it’s the party popper at the start of crypto’s favorite rollercoaster. Buckle up. 🎢

Déjà Vu: Bitcoin’s Annual Soap Opera

As every true chart-watcher knows, Bitcoin has a fondness for historical reenactment. Rekt Capital’s chart is basically four years of “previously on Bitcoin…” episodes:

Year 1: Bull market peak (see: 2021, memes everywhere)

Year 2: Dramatic nosedive—aka bear market (2022, tissues sold separately)

Year 3: Long, awkward accumulation and recovery (2023–2024, the “maybe we should have stuck to dogecoin” phase)

Year 4: Major breakout and rally (hello, 2025!)

2026: Bear Market aka Please Mind the Gap

Rekt Capital’s message for next year? Lower those expectations, my friend. 2026 could be a classic “if you haven’t sold by now, just shut the laptop and go for a walk” sort of year. Bears everywhere, running amok, carnage on the digital streets. Great time for character building (and regretting buying in at the top).

2027: The Hangover Year

By 2027, the carnage settles down (or everyone is just too tired to care). This is historically when Bitcoin decides it’s had enough self-pity and starts getting its act together for another joyride. If you missed out on the 2025 party, 2027 could be your “backdoor into the cool club” moment. Kind of like sneaking in late and pretending you’ve been there all along.

So, if you’re sitting there in indecision, waiting for a “sign”—this is it. Or not. Ask a Magic 8-Ball. Truly, if Bitcoin has taught us anything, it’s that financial forecasting is basically astrology with more spreadsheets. ✨

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2025-05-10 12:52