The Peculiar Perils of Paper: Kiyosaki’s Jazz Hands of Wealth! 💸✨

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Bingo! The old boy Robert Kiyosaki, that arch-schemer of Rich Dad Poor Dad fame, has once more unleashed a tempest of fiscal wisdom upon the hapless masses. With a twinkle in his eye and a quip on his lips, he warns that ETFs—those paper talismans—are no substitute for the tactile thrill of gold, silver, and Bitcoin. “A picture of a gun,” he declares, “is no substitute for the real thing. Unless you fancy a portrait firing blanks!”

In a recent missive on X, the venerable 78-year-old (still spry enough to outwit Wall Street’s weasels) waxed lyrical about the virtues of “real” assets. “For the average investor,” he opines, “ETFs are dandy. But know this: owning a picture of gold is not the same as holding a nugget in your palm. Or a Bitcoin on your ledger. Or a silver spoon in your tea.”

BEWARE OF PAPER! 🚨

“ETFs make investing easier,” he sighs, “but I, a humble financial sage, must caution you. For the average investor, I recommend: Gold ETFs, Silver ETFs, Bitcoin ETFs. Yet an ETF is like having a picture…”

— Robert Kiyosaki (@theRealKiyosaki) July 25, 2025

Now, Mr. Kiyosaki’s analogy? A masterstroke! Comparing an ETF to “a picture of a gun for personal defense” is as sensible as calling a Monet a hunting rifle. Still, one must admire his flair for the dramatic. His disdain for Wall Street’s “financial naivety” is as old as the hills, and twice as entertaining.

Speaking of Bitcoin, the old boy has previously dismissed ETFs as “fake” compared to holding the real McCoy. “BTC: $116,487,” he quips, “24h volatility: 1.8%! Market cap: $2.32T. Vol. 24h: $84.41B. All very juicy, wouldn’t you say?”

And yet, Bitcoin ETFs have raked in $54.69 billion since their launch. On July 24, they even managed a $226 million net inflow amid price jitters. One must commend the market’s ability to turn chaos into cash.

Bitcoin’s Dip: A Dance, Not a Doomsday 🕺

Bitcoin, that mercurial marmalade, has retreated to $115,000 from its lofty perch of $123,000. In a week, it’s lost $80 billion in market cap, now languishing at $2.29T. Meanwhile, top cryptocurrencies and meme coins have all taken a tumble, shedding double-digit percentages like a man in a rainstorm.

But fear not! The Swissblock Bitcoin Risk Index is cheerfully oblivious to the chaos, reading a breezy “zero.” “Low risk,” it chirps, “structure intact!” As if the market’s a well-dressed gent at a garden party, not a bull in a china shop.

Bitcoin’s recent break-out? A rotation-led correction, not a meltdown. 🌟

→ Risk Index = 0 → No overheating → Structure intact

“The trend remains bullish. Corrections at low risk levels = opportunity, not exit.”

— Swissblock (@swissblock__) July 25, 2025

Swissblock, ever the optimist, insists this is a “healthy” correction. A chance to accumulate, not flee. “Periods of correction,” they declare, “are mere dress rehearsals for the grand finale.” One can almost hear the clinking of champagne glasses in the background.

BUBBLES are about to start BUSTING. 💥

“When bubbles bust, odds are gold, silver, and Bitcoin will bust too. Good news. If prices crash… I will be buying.”

— Robert Kiyosaki (@theRealKiyosaki) July 21, 2025

And there we have it! Kiyosaki, that shrewd old fox, is already plotting his next move. “A near-term bubble burst?” he grins. “Precisely when I’ll be increasing my holdings.” One suspects he’s already got his metaphorical shopping list ready, complete with gold bars, silver coins, and a Bitcoin or two.

All in all, a delightful tangle of fiscal advice, where paper meets reality and the only thing more volatile than Bitcoin is the human capacity for optimism. 🚀

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2025-07-25 16:53