Michael Saylor Drops More Bitcoin Hints Than a Magpie at a Shiny Objects Convention!

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In a post that can only be described as delightfully enigmatic—a bit like trying to decipher a cat’s thoughts—one Michael Saylor casually tossed out the phrase “no tariffs on orange dots.” Now, unless you’re a particularly astute fruit vendor or a cryptography enthusiast, you might be scratching your head until your scalp starts to resemble a very confused map.

Details, of course, are as scarce as a sensible policy in a room of politicians, but the timing of this message is sending ripples through the Bitcoin-loving populace. Speculation is swirling like a particularly vigorous tornado that a new purchase announcement could descend upon us as soon as Monday. Last time out, on the bewilderingly specific date of March 31, they bought a whopping $2 billion worth of Bitcoin! This led to Strategy managing to clamor about with nearly 530,000 BTC—a pile large enough to make Scrooge McDuck envious.

A little birdie might suggest that Strategy kicked back and sipped on some lemonade in the week following that massive haul, as no shiny new Bitcoin nuggets were reported between March 31 and April 6. Historically speaking—or more like historically guessing—Strategy’s deals have had about as much immediate impact on Bitcoin’s price as a feather landing in a barrel of molasses. The market tends to whisper sweet nothings well in advance of Strategy’s shopping escapades.

At the moment, Bitcoin is frolicking around the $84,762 mark, while Strategy’s stock took a teeny tiny tumble, dipping 0.69% in after-hours trade. Just as the dust of Friday’s 10% surge was settling, it seems our dear Strategy couldn’t hold onto a good vibe.

Despite the rather basic brush strokes of 2025 thus far—think of it as a calm sea before a potential storm of unfathomable madness—Saylor seems as unfazed as a cat in a room full of rocking chairs when it comes to Bitcoin’s temperamental price behavior. He recently labeled the cryptocurrency as “powered by chaos,” which is either a profound statement or just an excellent excuse to blame things on the universe.

With Strategy’s average cost per coin resting comfortably at $67,458, one must wonder: when will the whole thing come crashing down like a poorly built house of cards? And yet, through it all, Saylor remains steadfast in insisting that Bitcoin is the core of Strategy’s investment game plan—something he considers far more riveting than even the likes of Tesla and Nvidia, which, let’s be honest, is like claiming your lollipop is tastier than a chocolate cake.

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2025-04-14 08:35