Metaplanet’s $25M Bitcoin Gamble: You Won’t Believe What Happened Next!
Facts, my dear reader:
- Metaplanet: inventor of bonds, rainmaker of yen, now on a quest for more bitcoins—issued 3.6 billion of them (well, yen, not actual bonds, don’t get your hopes up for a bonfire), roughly $24.8 million if you’re counting in the currency of dreams and late-night ramen.
- The redemption: will be as mysterious as a Muscovite wallet and funded by exercising future stock rights, whenever the stars (and investors) align. How poetic!
In the neon-bathed labyrinths of Tokyo, where pachinko balls roll and destiny twitches impatiently, Metaplanet (ticker: 3350, not to be confused with the famed tram number), has declared a new ballet—flinging 3.6 billion yen (about $24.8 million) into bonds designed to feed its growing appetite for the digital miracle: bitcoin. By now, the company’s coffers spill with more than 5,000 BTC. Yes, that’s enough to make even your cat envious.
Sources from corridors darker than your morning coffee confirm: all these bonds found a new owner in EVO FUND. These financial wonders, devoid of interest (truly, bonds for ascetics!), shall return—like a boomerang, or a regret—at full value come October 31, 2025, unless EVO grows impatient and demands their due beforehand. Spooky, isn’t it? 🎃
The funds? Destined only for bitcoin acquisition, as foretold in their previous epistolary manifestos this year, where Metaplanet whispered of stock acquisition rights and plots more complicated than a Russian classic novel.
How to pay these bonds back? Ah, here lies the rub! Redemption shall depend on investors’ passion for Metaplanet’s equity-linked amusements. Should their zeal overflow (and wallets too), the firm may fling money at early repayments, dazzling everyone with its spontaneity.
For those who live and die by the ticker: Metaplanet’s shares ended the trading day at a heroic 428 yen, a proud leap of 8.6%. No word yet if champagne flowed or if accountants merely sighed and returned to their ledgers.
Stay tuned. In this strange, modern fable filled with blockchain dreams and yen swirling like autumn leaves, the only certainty: you never know who’s holding the bonds—or the vodka. 🥂
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2025-05-02 12:14