Malta’s $33M Crypto Charity Gift: A Tale of Rejection, Rivalry, and Ridiculousness 🤑

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Binance’s $33M charity donation to Malta was rejected over reputational concerns, sparking political debate among top officials.

Malta’s political elite are now engaged in a high-stakes game of bureaucratic hopscotch, all thanks to Binance’s $33 million charity donation. Originally offered in 2018 (when BNB was about as valuable as a damp sponge), the donation has now ballooned to a wallet-busting $33 million. The Malta Community Chest Fund (MCCF) declined it, presumably because they’re still reeling from the existential crisis of accepting crypto from a company that might or might not have a good name. 🤷♂️

Finance Minister Supports Rejection Over Reputational Concerns

Finance Minister Clyde Caruana threw his weight behind the MCCF’s decision, citing “reputational concerns.” In a statement that could double as a Zen koan, he said, “You either give to charity or you don’t. Don’t dance around it.” Presumably, he’s referring to the MCCF’s refusal to provide patient data like medical records and crypto wallet addresses-which Binance had requested to ensure the funds reached beneficiaries. Because nothing says “trust” like demanding someone’s medical history and wallet address. 🤝

The MCCF rejected 30,644 BNB (originally worth $200k in 2018, now a princely $33 million). Binance, in its infinite wisdom, couldn’t send the money without the MCCF’s cooperation. The result? A standoff so absurd it makes a Monty Python sketch look restrained. 🐍

President Labels Donation as Bogus Amid Trust Concerns

President Myriam Spiteri Debono, ever the skeptic, has labeled the donation “bogus,” claiming Binance Charity has “no good name.” At a school event, she warned that accepting the funds would be unfair to law-abiding donors. One wonders if she’s ever heard of a charity gala, where the attendees’ names are often less reputable than Binance’s. 🤡

Binance, meanwhile, insists it can’t release the funds without the MCCF’s paperwork. In 2021, they noted the MCCF hadn’t provided crypto wallet addresses or beneficiary documents. Since then, the two parties have been stuck in a loop of polite but unproductive correspondence. It’s like watching a dog chase its tail, but with more spreadsheets. 🐕📊

Prime Minister and Other Officials Urge Reconsideration

Prime Minister Robert Abela, ever the optimist, expressed “concern” over the “missed opportunity.” He urged the MCCF to revisit their decision, lamenting that “a sum like that… could possibly be lost.” One imagines him pacing his office, muttering, “Where’s the profit in principle?” Opposing lawmakers like Edward Zammit Lewis and Rosianne Cutajar joined the chorus, suggesting the MCCF could’ve “found a way.” Meanwhile, Opposition leader Alex Borg added his voice, presumably for the sake of balance. 🤝

The donation saga has now metastasized into a national identity crisis. Political figures are taking sides like they’re choosing teams for a cosmic game of chess, and the $33 million remains unallocated. The future of the funds is as clear as a crypto transaction fee-i.e., nonexistent. 💸

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2025-10-22 10:22