Crypto news

Investors Rush to Make Bitcoin the New Gold, Oranje Plans to Lead the Way!

BBG News

In a world where everything is either collapsing or “disrupting” (depending on how much coffee you’ve had), a new hero emerges from the dark and dusty financial caverns of Latin America. Meet Oranje – a shiny, yet mysterious firm that’s preparing to funnel a cool $200 million into Bitcoin, because why not? It’s not like the financial system is already on fire or anything. 💸

Backed by local financial titans and those ancient sages of Bitcoin who remember the days when a whole coin cost the price of a decent lunch, Oranje is ready to make a move. And by “move,” we mean a $200 million plunge into BTC. The firm is being steered by none other than Itau BBA—the investment arm of Latin America’s financial behemoth (basically, if you don’t know them, you’ve never heard of money). Leading the charge are the illustrious figures of Guilherme Gomes, ex-Swan Bitcoin, and Guilherme Ferreira, formerly with Bahema. These folks are no strangers to the realm of crypto, and with them comes the mighty Fernando Ulrich, a man so pro-Bitcoin he probably dreams in hashes. Oh, and there’s Josh Levine, former Bridgewater member, who might as well have a PhD in “How to Make Money in an Unpredictable Market.” 🧑‍💻

But hold on, what’s the point of all this? Well, the master plan is to ride the *institutional* wave of Bitcoin, which, by the way, is still at a humble <5% global adoption. You’d think people would have noticed by now, but hey, it’s not like the world’s financial system is on fire… oh wait, we already said that. The goal is simple: borrow some funds, swap them for Bitcoin, and lock in long-term value. Standard stuff, right?

Now, this isn’t just your typical “buy Bitcoin and hope for the best” strategy. Oranje isn’t here to play small. According to some very secretive internal docs (so mysterious, they might as well be written in invisible ink), this firm plans to *yield returns in BTC directly.* No middlemen, no ETFs – just cold, hard Bitcoin. Investors could see as much as 45% returns in the first year. Let that sink in. And don’t worry, unlike those traditional ETFs that take forever and a half to make a move, Oranje promises you a smoother ride with better tax conditions. 🎉

So, what’s next? Well, Oranje plans to raise $210 million in the first phase—because why stop at a mere $200 million when you can aim higher? Once that’s in the bag, they’ll shift their focus to building revenue, gaining fame, and making sure everyone in the financial world knows their name. They’ll conquer crypto, one Bitcoin at a time, while you’re still trying to figure out how to use your own wallet. 🙄

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2025-04-30 05:38

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