Ethereum’s Big Shift: Bye Vitalik, Hello Fewer Headaches! 🚀

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So it has come to pass: Vitalik Buterin, that ever-illuminating soul of Ethereum, will no longer be tangled in the tiresome threads of daily management. One might say he’s stepping back to breathe the rarer air of “research and exploration,” rather than firefighting the usual chaos. How civil.

Tomasz K. Stanczak, chimney-sweep turned co-executive director, assures us that this departure from crisis-response-bound toil will free Vitalik to roam freely among RISC-V and zkVMs—not exactly the village gossip topics, but who are we to judge? 🧐

“When Vitalik speaks, the world shivers—or at least pretends to. His musings on privacy and his knack for nudging Ethereum back onto what they term ‘core values’ may not bring immediate cheer, but they do spark conversations. Sometimes serious, sometimes in the fashion of a cat batting a slipper around,” says Tomasz, with all the solemnity of a bored playwright.

Meanwhile, the Foundation’s gaze shifts closer to home, fingers crossed that scaling Layer 1 and Layer 2 won’t turn out to be some cruel joke played by cryptographic gods. They promise wondrous “user experience” improvements under fanciful names like Pectra, Fusaka, and Glamsterdam—which sound less like tech updates and more like exotic cocktails. 🍸

“We’re also toying with the impossible—speeding up projects that were once destined to grow old and gray in a three-to-five-year slumber. Perhaps some will bloom amid these next-generation execution and consensus layers. Or perhaps not. The suspense is delicious.”

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2025-04-23 12:23