ETH to the Moon?! Or Doom? 🚀📉

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So, this Ben Gray bloke, a crypto analyst apparently, reckons Ethereum‘s feeling bullish. Like it’s just had a really good therapy session or something. He’s bandying about price ranges, you know, like it’s all perfectly predictable. 🙄

Ethereum Price and the $2,100 Hurdle

Apparently, Ethereum’s got a bit of a thing for $2,160. It’s the price to beat, the cool girl it needs to impress. He says it’s eyeing “new highs,” which sounds exhausting, doesn’t it? Like, can’t it just chill for a bit? Apparently not. It’s fluctuating between $2,044 and $2,080, which sounds suspiciously like my bank balance after a particularly good weekend. He also said it bottomed out, good for it 👏.

He’s been staring at candles. 4-hour candlestick charts, no less. I mean, get a hobby, Ben. Says it’s trying to break through upwards, very dramatic. And he’s all optimistic about 2025, bless him. Between $2,904 and $4,887, he chirps. Still below its all-time high, mind you. So, not exactly a roaring success, is it?

This week’s been good, apparently. Positive performance, he says. Ooh, get you, Ethereum! But the big question is, can it shag…er, break through that $2,160 barrier? He says that’s key. For its “trajectory.” I mean, who talks like that?

And then there’s Ali Martinez, chipping in with his two cents – or rather, his $2,300 resistance level. Because one resistance level clearly wasn’t enough drama. He says it needs to reclaim $2,040 and hurdle $2,300. Too many numbers, my brain hurts 😵‍💫.

Why ETH Has Bottomed (allegedly)

Titan of Crypto – *eye roll* – claims Ethereum’s showing signs of bottoming. Like a discarded handbag after a particularly heavy night out. Something about a “weekly Stochastic RSI bullish crossover” in “oversold territory.” Honestly, it sounds like some sort of weird crypto sex act. He says it could rally to $6,000. Well, good for it. Get that bag, girl.

Crypto Caesar (they really need to work on these names) also reckons Ethereum’s on the up. Says it’s “heavily undervalued.” Apparently, in every bull cycle, everyone thinks it’s doomed. But it always bounces back. Like me after a really bad Tinder date. So, he thinks this time will be different. Because crypto never learns. Just like us.

Currently trading at around $2,022, apparently. Down almost 2% in the last 24 hours, according to CoinMarketCap. So, you know, maybe don’t remortgage the house just yet. 😉

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2025-03-27 18:42