Eric Adams Wants Bitcoin Bonds? Is This a Joke? 😂

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So, New York City Mayor Eric Adams, the guy who probably thinks Bitcoin is a new flavor of bagel, is all in on launching a Bitcoin bond. Yeah, you heard that right! He’s also calling for the end of New York’s BitLicense program. Because, you know, who needs regulations? 🙄

At the Bitcoin 2025 conference—because where else would you announce such a thing?—Adams said he’s going to fight for municipal bonds backed by Bitcoin (BTC). I mean, why not? We have bonds for everything else, right? Tax-exempt bonds, bonds for your grandma’s birthday, but no Bitcoin bonds? What a travesty! 🎉

“We have financial instruments for all other bonds. It is time for the first time in the history of this city to have a financial instrument that is made for those who are holders of Bitcoin,” he declared. Wow, what a revelation! Next, he’ll tell us we need a bond for people who collect stamps. 📬

He’s pushing for a “Bitbond.” Sounds fancy, doesn’t it? But he didn’t really explain how it would work. Just a vague promise of 1% interest for 10 years. I mean, who wouldn’t want to invest in something that sounds like a bad sci-fi movie? 🤖

When the bond matures, you might get a slice of Bitcoin market gains. But wait, 90% of the funds go to government spending. So, basically, it’s like giving your money to a kid with a candy addiction. 🍭

Adams Again Pushes to Axe BitLicense

And let’s not forget, Adams is also on a crusade to get rid of New York’s BitLicense program. You know, the one that makes sure crypto businesses don’t just run wild like it’s the Wild West. He thinks it’s too costly and strict. Well, maybe if you didn’t want to be a crypto mayor, you wouldn’t have to deal with it! 😅

“You have a mayor who is the crypto mayor, is the Bitcoin mayor, and I want you back in the city of New York, where you won’t be attacked and criminalized,” he said. Sounds like a great campaign slogan: “Vote for me, I promise not to criminalize you!” 🗳️

USDC stablecoin issuer Circle was one of the first to get a BitLicense. Now, it’s like a badge of honor. “Look, I have a BitLicense!” said no one ever. 🙈

Adams is really trying to attract crypto firms to NYC. He even created a digital advisory council. Because, you know, that’s what we need—more councils! What’s next, a council for people who like pineapple on pizza? 🍍🍕

And just to keep things spicy, he announced that financial services company Figure and private equity firms Traction and Scale would be helping the city with its crypto efforts. Because nothing says “trustworthy” like a bunch of private equity firms! 💰

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2025-05-29 09:17