DOLO’s Dismal Dive: A Crypto Caper of Catastrophic Proportions! 💸🤦‍♂️

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My dear, financially fraught friends, gather ’round. It appears Dolomite, or DOLO if you’re frightfully informal, is having a simply dreadful time on its little blockchain adventure. It’s all terribly exciting and not at all like watching a slow-motion train wreck in the Swiss Alps. The only thing potentially saving this ghastly affair? A rather curious dalliance with something called World Liberty Financial. How utterly dramatic.

One would think that securing a table at the two most exclusive restaurants in town-Coinbase and Binance, darling-would lead to celebration. But no. Instead of popping champagne, DOLO’s value has done the equivalent of tripping over the rug and landing face-first in the caviar. It’s still falling, with all the grace of a tipsy heiress at a wedding.

Even the Big Exchanges Can’t Stop This Glorious Nosedive

The DOLO price has shed a positively vulgar 30% in a single day. Twenty cents? My goodness, I’ve lost more than that down the back of a sofa. It’s all so… pedestrian.

This farce began when Coinbase, in a moment of questionable judgment, added the token to its little roadmap. A week later, Binance Africa chirped in with promises of an airdrop-a virtual handful of confetti thrown at a sinking ship. 🚢

Normally, this would cause a frightful rush of optimism. For Dolomite, it caused a collapse. It’s the financial equivalent of a standing ovation for a play that’s just had the set fall over. Bravo!

As the listings fail to perform their one job, the chattering classes are pointing fingers at this WLFI entanglement. A scandal in the making? How delicious.

A Tangled Web of Advisory Roles and Wild Speculation

Dolomite started its life on Arbitrum-how quaint-before expanding to other places with positively exhausting acronyms. It fancies itself a “next-generation money market.” How very ambitious of it.

The plot thickened last September when one Corey Caplan, the co-founder of this whole shebang, decided to also advise for WLFI. They called him the “first of many.” One can only imagine the queue. 😉

Meet Corey Caplan – Co-founder and creator of Dolomite!

An early Ethereum builder since 2017, cryptopunk enthusiast, and one of the most innovative minds in DeFi, Corey has joined World Liberty Financial’s advisory team and is the first of many incredible people we are…

– WLFI (@worldlibertyfi) August 30, 2024

This dual involvement has sent the rumor mill into an absolute frenzy. Crypto traders on X are clutching at this WLFI connection like it’s the last life raft on the Titanic. It’s all terribly hopeful.

“If DOLO is going to be in direct partnership with WLFI over AAVE… It’s going straight into the stratosphere. Easily doing multiples from here,” wrote one analyst, presumably with a crystal ball firmly in hand.

Another intrepid soul was tracking blockchain data, which is apparently a thing one does now, noting that WLFI had already used Dolomite to borrow money. How… practical.

“DOLO is probably one of the most undervalued projects at the moment,” the trader said, with optimism that would be charming if it weren’t so misplaced.

The prevailing wisdom seems to be that DOLO is a “beta play” for WLFI. A rehearsal for the main event. How thrilling for everyone involved.

The WLFI narrative is starting to gain momentum, and $DOLO is the #1 beta play for it.

I’ll repeat what I’ve said before: @CoreyCaplan3 the CEO of @Dolomite_io is also the CTO at @worldlibertyfi $DOLO is the

– Kornik (@kornik_crypto) August 9, 2025

Meanwhile, in a shocking twist, it seems some large holders are actually buying more of this declining asset. Whales, they call them. Spending hundreds of thousands. It’s either a masterstroke or mass hysteria. I know which one my money is on. 💅

So here we are, at a crossroads. Will this WLFI narrative prove to be its salvation, turning this current debacle into a mere footnote? Or is this just another spectacular chapter in the book of crypto calamities?

Until we know, the poor dears holding DOLO bags are stuck between the hype of a political crypto venture and the cold, hard reality of a chart that looks like it’s fallen down a rather deep well. My heart simply bleeds for them. ✨

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2025-08-28 11:20