Did Warren Buffett Just Accidentally Promote Bitcoin? His Dollar Remarks Raise Eyebrows

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At the sixtieth convocation of the Berkshire Hathaway faithful—a gathering that makes Woodstock seem like a parish bake sale—Mr. Warren Buffett, that most silver-haired of financial oracles, chose not to juggle apples or conjure gold from thin air, but instead sent tremors through the ballroom by whispering darkly of the U.S. dollar’s receding virtue.

Normally, Buffett regards Bitcoin with the same enthusiasm he reserves for dubious seafood, but his utterances this year suggest an uncharacteristic flirtation with the digital darling. Has the grand cynic of Omaha grown weary of being untrendy? One can only hope his cardigan has bohemian patches.

A Weakening Dollar: The Empire Sips its Tea While Rome Burns ☕🔥

In a tone dripping with as much concern as one can muster without fainting into a pile of balance sheets, Buffett lamented the fiscal prudence of the United States. The government, he surmised, prints money as though it’s been handed a Monopoly set for Christmas: the more you print, the less your paper is worth—unless your Monopoly set is vintage, in which case, invest immediately.

“Fiscal policy is what scares me in the U.S.,” he pronounced, presumably between sips of lukewarm tap water. In case the audience thought he was about to praise Washington’s stewardship, he clarified that investing in a self-immolating currency was not high on his to-do list.

Berkshire’s Moves: Panic, but With Style 🏦🎩

Let it not be said that Warren Buffett’s words are mere bluster. The old knight may not slay dragons, but he does sell $134 billion in stocks without breaking a sweat (including Apple and Bank of America, no less). Meanwhile, Berkshire’s cash reserves have ballooned to $347 billion, which is roughly the GDP of a small, reasonably ambitious country—or two Kardashians.

The message? Defensive posturing, with the elegance of a Victorian matron bracing herself for the latest scandal, and a war chest ready for whatever calamity next emerges from the financial fog.

Bitcoin: The Elephant in the Ballroom 🐘💸

Buffett skillfully avoided naming Bitcoin—one mustn’t scandalize the help. Yet every wisp of warning he uttered seemed to carry the faint scent of digital currency. After all, Bitcoin’s defining attributes—a fixed supply, decentralization, and the ability to inspire existential dread in central bankers—are exactly what society’s more paranoid citizens recommend in uncertain times.

Buffett hasn’t donned a laser-eyed avatar (yet), but whispers are now louder than the average Berkshire dividend check, and the debate on Bitcoin is well and truly crooning.

Berkshire All-In On Bitcoin? The Internet Faints, Recovers, Posts Memes 🫨🌐

The rumor mill, fueled by X (née Twitter) and its fleet of self-appointed financial Nostradamuses, suggests Berkshire may soon court Bitcoin with the kind of commitment normally reserved for reality TV engagements. MicroStrategy may have to hand over its ceremonial Bit-bling should this prophecy materialize.

If the world’s bravest slow-movers are flirting with cryptocurrency, perhaps it’s only a matter of time before the Oracle of Omaha himself dips a toe—cautiously, with both eyebrows raised—into Bitcoin’s digital waters.

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2025-05-05 10:27