CZ’s Lawyer Fights Back: Pardon or Payoff? 🦊

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Oh, what a tangled web we weave! The tale of Changpeng Zhao’s presidential pardon is as twisted as a corkscrew in a tornado, but his lawyer, Teresa Goody Guillén, is on a mission to untangle the lies. With a flick of her pen (and a dash of sass), she declares the “pay-to-play” accusations are as true as a magician’s rabbit in a hat. 🕵️♂️

The drama escalates with whispers of Binance’s cozy chats with the Trump family. After Trump’s reelection, Binance became as close as a koala in a tree-well, maybe not that close, but definitely a bit too familiar with World Liberty Financial, a crypto company that’s supposedly “Trump-linked.” 🧢💸

These shady dealings, paired with Zhao’s October pardon (granted months after he served a four-month prison sentence), have sparked rumors of a “quid-pro-quo” so sneaky, even a fox would blush. Senator Elizabeth Warren, ever the drama queen, calls it “corruption” with the flair of a Shakespearean villain. 🎭

Lawyer Rejects Links Between CZ and Trump’s Crypto Ventures

Guillén, with the poise of a seasoned storyteller, insists there’s no evidence Trump owns World Liberty Financial. Yet, the media keeps spinning tales like a child with a top. “They’re chasing shadows,” she says, while the world watches in glee. 🕵️♀️

CZ, once the king of Binance, served four months in jail for… well, something that wasn’t fraud, victims, or a criminal history. Then, out of nowhere, Trump pardons him, claiming, “It wasn’t a crime!” 🤡

Sen. Warren’s Criticism Sparks Pushback

Warren, ever the alarmist, accuses CZ of boosting Trump’s crypto ventures and lobbying for his freedom. CZ, with the grace of a disgruntled panda, retorts, “She can’t get her facts right!” 🐼

Guillén agrees, pointing out Warren’s claims are as accurate as a broken compass. She also criticizes the “immunity” of politicians, who can spout lies without a care. “This isn’t what the founders intended,” she says, as if they’d approve of this chaos. 🕍

A Pardon Framed as ‘Justice’

Guillén paints the pardon as a noble act, not a political favor. She claims CZ was unfairly targeted in a “war on crypto,” a battle where everyone’s a hero except the guy who got caught with his hand in the cookie jar. 🍪

“He’s the only one prosecuted for a crime with no fraud, no victims, and no criminal history!” she exclaims, as if this makes it all better. 🤷‍♂️

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2025-11-17 14:10