Ah, the labyrinthine depths of the crypto markets! How they mirror the human soul-dark, convoluted, and prone to sudden, inexplicable fits of madness. Behold, the tale of USDe’s “depeg,” a drama so absurd it could only be penned by the hand of fate herself, or perhaps by some mischievous deity with a penchant for chaos. 🌪️
Guy Young, the architect of Ethena Labs, proclaims with the fervor of a man defending his honor that the USDe synthetic dollar’s fall on Binance was naught but a mere oracle’s folly. “An internal oracle issue,” he declares, as if the oracles themselves had turned traitor, whispering lies into the ears of the exchange. The collateral? Immaculate. The Ethena protocol? Flawless. The token? A paragon of virtue. Yet, the price plummeted from $1 to $0.65, a fall so precipitous it would make Icarus blush. 😇
“It worked perfectly,” Young insists, his voice dripping with the sarcasm of a man who has seen the absurdity of it all. $2 billion redeemed in 24 hours, across Curve, Fluid, and Uniswap, with price deviations so minimal they could be measured in the whispers of angels-30 basis points or less. And yet, Binance, that grand stage of crypto theater, chose to dance to the tune of its own orderbook, a tune so discordant it sent the markets reeling. 🎭
“The severe price discrepancy was isolated to a single venue, which referenced the oracle index on its own orderbook, not the deepest pool of liquidity, and was facing deposit and withdrawal issues during the event, which did not allow market makers to close the loop.”
“No one would have been liquidated,” he laments, his words echoing through the void like a prophet’s curse. But the markets, oh fickle markets, had other plans. A cascade of liquidations, a deluge of $20 billion in open leveraged positions wiped away in a single day. And some say this is but the tip of the iceberg, a mere prelude to the financial apocalypse. 🧊
Was It Fate, or Foul Play?
Enter ElonTrades, a crypto trader with the instincts of a bloodhound and the wit of a jester. He posits that the USDe depeg was no accident, but a coordinated attack, a scheme so devious it would make Machiavelli weep with envy. The culprit? Binance’s “Unified Account” feature, a vulnerability so glaring it might as well have been painted in neon. 🎯
The attackers, those shadowy figures lurking in the depths of the digital underworld, seized the moment. They dumped $90 million of USDe on Binance, sending its price spiraling to $0.65, and igniting a firestorm of liquidations-$1 billion in losses, a mere trifle in the grand scheme of their plan. Meanwhile, they opened short positions on Bitcoin and Ether on Hyperliquid, minutes before Trump’s tariff announcement sent the markets into a tailspin. The result? A tidy profit of $192 million, as the contagion spread like a plague through the crypto world. 🦠
Kris Marszalek, the CEO of Crypto.com, calls for an investigation, his voice a clarion call in the wilderness. But will the truth be found, or will it be lost in the labyrinth of lies and half-truths that is the crypto market? Only time will tell, dear reader, only time. ⌛
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2025-10-12 21:00