Coinbase’s Indian Comeback: Burned Boats & Crypto Dreams 🚀

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Major US crypto exchange Coinbase is back in India, two years after a very dramatic exit. Because nothing says “we’re sorry” like a two-year hiatus and a “clean slate” (which, coincidentally, is also the name of their new app). 🎭

Coinbase is rolling out local fiat on-ramps in 2026, because why not? John O’Loghlen, APAC director, said they “burned the boats” to make way for “a clean slate.” Which, honestly, sounds like a bad breakup text. 💔

So, after a troubled debut in 2022, Coinbase is back. Because nothing says “we’re committed” like leaving customers stranded overseas and then coming back with a “fresh start.” 🙃

Crypto-to-crypto trades available immediately

Users can now trade crypto-to-crypto, but only if they’re part of the “early-access program.” Which, of course, is just a fancy way of saying “we’re still figuring it out, but here’s a 50% chance you’ll get in.” 🎉

Karan Malik, their new India marketing lead, previously handled last year’s IBW event. Now he’s “bringing Coinbase to the party.” Which, honestly, is the least surprising thing about this whole saga. 🎭

Malik said, “Last year, I was building the marketing playbook for IBW. This year, I’m bringing Coinbase to the party.” Which is like saying, “I used to organize your birthday, now I’m hosting it.” 🎂

Coinbase ramps up push in India

Coinbase is now “actively rebuilding relationships” with the Indian government. Because nothing says “we’re serious” like meeting with a Parliamentary committee and then posting on X. 📢

Katie Mitch told them, “We’re optimistic about VDA regulation.” Which, if you’re not in the crypto game, means “we’re hoping the rules will magically become friendly.” 🤞

Karnataka’s IT minister signed a MoU with Coinbase to “deepen blockchain innovation.” Which, in other words, means “we’re going to make your life harder, but in a good way.” 🚀

Coinbase also got a license from India’s Financial Intelligence Unit. Because nothing says “we’re compliant” like a 2025 license. 📄

CryptoMoon asked for a comment, but Coinbase is still “busy” (read: avoiding). So, we’re left with this… and a very confused investor. 💸

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2025-12-08 11:57