Bitcoin has risen 10% this week, as if the market itself had suddenly remembered how to breathe. Wallets, those digital reliquaries of wealth, have abandoned distribution for accumulation like penitents seeking redemption. On Thursday, Bitcoin pierced $121,000-a height last seen in August, when the world was younger and hope less expensive.
Momentum in crypto ETFs is behaving as if it discovered a new gilded banner and forgot to tell the stock market about it. For the fourth straight day, investors poured capital into both Bitcoin and Ether funds, reinforcing the notion that institutional appetite for digital trinkets has rekindled its romance with the markets. 🕵️♂️
This audacious venture, forged in partnership with Kraken and Backed (names that roll off the tongue like a well-aged Bordeaux), promises fractional equities and dividends that dance into your wallet at any hour, day or night. 🌙✨ Trading shall proceed with the relentless rhythm of a metronome-24/5-because who needs weekends? The rollout, however, will unfold like a slow waltz, beginning in select regions by October’s end. One wonders if this is progress or merely a performance. 🤔
It is remarked upon with no small degree of interest that the present advancement bears a striking resemblance to a certain episode in mid-August, when a daily close above $120,000 precipitated a most agreeable bounce towards the all-time high of $124,000. The conduct of our protagonist at this juncture may well foretell his future intentions, though whether they be honourable remains to be seen. 🧐
The October 2 filing? It’s basically VanEck shouting, “We’re not just crypto tourists! We’re here to *yield*!” 🗣️ While approval’s about as certain as a weather forecast in a hurricane, it’s enough to make staking enthusiasts scream, “Liquid staking’s back, baby!” (Even though it never left. ???)
DOGE traded between $0.251 and $0.264 from Oct. 2, 04:00 to Oct. 3, 03:00, posting a 2.7% net gain after navigating both intraday correction and recovery phases. Analysts pointed to institutional desks as the dominant flow driver, with SBI and ETF speculation keeping broader bid interest intact. Technical specialists, with their heads in the clouds, highlighted an emerging ascending megaphone pattern and hidden bullish divergence, suggesting potential upside remains despite short-term sell pressure. 🚀📉
“We started with a teeny-tiny $0.25 billion in Bitcoin,” said Saylor, pretending that starting with a quarter of a billion dollars isn’t a big deal. “Oh, and there was that $0.04 billion unrealized loss right off the bat.” Talk about a rollercoaster! 🎢 Fast forward to today, and Strategy’s Bitcoin stash is now worth a monstrous $77.4 billion. It’s practically double its value from last year. This is the stuff of legends-or at least Wall Street fairytales.
In a move as delightfully perverse as a knight errant in armored pajamas, Tether Holdings, that behemoth of elastic money, turns to the video vortex of Rumble Inc., to propel its pristine USAT token-a dollar-devoted darling, regulated with the precision of a Swiss watch in the Wild West-to duel in the chaotically crowded arena of American cryptos. How quaint, how droll! 🤓
Certain individuals, described as ‘blockchain sleuths’ – a term which sounds suspiciously like a profession invented solely to vex one’s sensibilities – have traced the movement of these funds. These funds, it appears, departed from addresses beginning with the rather unromantic designations “0x40d7” and “bc1qx0a2k.” How very vulgar.