Cryptonews

In the Southern District of New York, where the air is thick with legal paperwork and the occasional whiff of desperation, federal prosecutors filed a detailed memorandum on March 11. This masterpiece of legal prose opposes the imprisoned ex-FTX CEO’s plea for a retrial under the ever-so-exciting Federal Rule of Criminal Procedure 33. The filing, with all the subtlety of a dwarf with a grudge, asks the court to deny the motion outright. Why? Because, as they so eloquently put it, the evidence Bankman-Fried is waving around was as known as the Ankh-Morpork Watch’s incompetence before his 2023 trial-and wouldn’t have changed the verdict if it had been served on a silver platter.

The CoinDesk 20, that paragon of stability, now teeters at 2012.94, having shed 0.2% like a miser parting with a penny. A mere 4.89 points lost since 4 p.m. ET-truly, a day of profound financial drama.

In a post on X, Bankman-Fried didn’t just credit the Trump administration for changing the SEC’s direction. He made a pointed allegation about what was happening behind closed doors under the previous chair. Spoiler: It involved more drama than a daytime soap.

Whales, those leviathans of liquidity, have been hoarding SOL, their shadows looming over derivatives traders who bet against the tide. A standoff brews, liquidation stakes high enough to make even a Genghis Khan blush. One side clings to hope; the other, to hubris.

As a crypto investor, I’m always looking at the bigger picture, and it’s amazing to see where Bitcoin stands in the overall ‘store of value’ market. Right now, that market is around $38 trillion, and gold still dominates with about $36 trillion – that’s almost 95% of it! Bitcoin, while growing rapidly, currently represents just under $1.4 trillion, or a little under 4%. It really highlights the potential for growth if Bitcoin continues to gain traction.

Investors and developers, ever the romantics of technology, built DeFi protocols in isolation, like children building sandcastles on a beach. The result? Fragmented liquidity and assets that cannot be moved easily from one chain to another. They built exceptional tracks, but these do not work well together. What we are now witnessing, as a result, is the start of a new era of government involvement in the sector, synthesising law, code, assets, and capital into sovereign-grade blockchain rails capable of unlocking trillions in value. We call this programmable finance, or ProFi. A name as grand as a royal decree.

Bitcoin tiptoes near $70,000, having rebounded from February’s lower theatrics in the low $60,000s, yet the rebound has the hesitant air of a debutante unsure if she should curtsy or run. Price action keeps rebuffing advances within the $69K-$71K ballroom.

Yet, for all its grandeur, the machinery of global oil trading remains as archaic as a Victorian parlour game. Massive legacy exchanges, reams of paperwork, and barriers so high they’d make the Alps blush-it’s enough to make one long for the simplicity of a quill and inkwell.

Cardano futures went live on CME Group on February 9. That single development, as the Cardano Foundation posted on X, signaled a step-change in institutional access for ADA. Regulated derivatives trading opened Cardano to a new class of participants, from trading firms to institutional investors who previously had no compliant entry point. (Spoiler: They’re now all trying to figure out what “ADA” stands for.)

XRP’s valiant attempt to stay above $1.4120 was a short-lived affair, much like a romantic comedy where the leads can never quite get it together. Down it went, following in the proud footsteps of Bitcoin and Ethereum.