Bitcoin Awakens, Altcoins Flee in Terror
It seems that XRP has decided to go its own way, with its correlation to BTC slipping from 0.79 to 0.70. Meanwhile, Solana (SOL) has jumped from 0.53 to 0.75, because who doesn’t love a good game of correlation musical chairs? 🎶 Ethereum (ETH) and THETA, on the other hand, are still BFFs with Bitcoin, mirroring its every move like a pair of crypto-obsessed stalkers 👀.
SEC Throws Solana ETF Into Bureaucratic Soup—Regulatory Shocks Await!
The SEC, always eager for correspondence that will never be read, requests rebuttals within 35 days. An army of analysts from Bloomberg like James Seyffart, mouths pursed like over-boiled dumplings, nod with solemnity: “But of course, the SEC is about as ready for Solana as an old auntie is for TikTok.” No shock here—if it isn’t Bitcoin or Ethereum, regulators eye it like soup with suspicious meat floating inside.
SEC Approves Trump’s Truth Social Crypto ETF: Bitcoin and Ethereum Unleashed! 💸🚀
Cet ETF proposera aux investisseurs d’avoir une exposition à Bitcoin (BTC) et Ether (ETH) à travers des actions cotées à NYSE Arca, soutenues par les actifs cryptographiques, avec 75% alloués à Bitcoin et 25% à Ether, selon le dépôt.
Unleashing the Crypto Mystery: The Saga of Sleeping Bitcoins
Not long ago, a bitcoin whale made waves by shifting funds from eight separate wallets—each holding a hefty 10,000 BTC—for the first time in more than 14 years. TopMob has been tracking these long-idle coins for years. Commonly called “sleeping,” “dormant,” or “inactive” bitcoins, they’re simply units of bitcoin that haven’t budged from their blockchain addresses in ages, often sitting untouched for years on end.
IP’s 10% Surge: A Liquidity Love Story or a Bearish Betrayal?
Capital continues to pour in, pushing IP’s Total Value Locked (TVL) to unprecedented heights. This liquidity bonanza has been a nightmare for short traders, who are now nursing substantial losses, while derivative traders remain steadfast in their bearish bets. 🐻
Bitcoin’s Bizarre Dance with Institutions: A Tale of Premiums and Whales 🐳💰
Top analyst Darkfost, a name that rolls off the tongue like a fine Russian vodka, suggests that the current price action is orchestrated by none other than the institutional players. One of the most telling signs is the Coinbase Premium Gap, a measure of the difference in BTC prices between Coinbase Pro and Binance. Unlike ETF flows, which are accessible to all, Coinbase Pro is the playground of institutions and professional traders. This makes the premium gap a valuable tool for tracking the whims of the institutional elite. 🕵️♂️
Tornado Cash Lawsuit Blows Away
Apparently, lawsuits are considered moot when there’s no longer a need to litigate the issue at hand. Rather like a party that’s gone flat, one supposes. The Treasury had already removed those dreadful economic sanctions against Tornado Cash in March. One does wonder what all the fuss was about in the first place. 🤔
Gate.io Pulls the Rug on Pump.fun Token Presale Announcement: Chaos Ensues! 😱💥
Assuming the information was correct, the presale will take place on July 12. It’ll aim for a $600 million target, selling 150 billion of 1 trillion total tokens at $0.004 per unit.
Trump’s Crypto Empire Soars: TRUMP Token Launches on Tron, Market Cap Nears $2 Billion! 💸🚀
At present, the circulating market capitalization of TRUMP amounts to approximately 1.718 billion dollars. When all possible tokens are taken into account, its fully diluted valuation is 8.59 billion dollars. The current price of the token now 8.69 dollars per coin but has been up 3.3% in the past week. Despite this, many investors are now carefully monitoring whether the Tron launch will be able to increase its price once more.
Why I Regret Playing Chicken Road: The Feathered Inferno
Like most things labeled “fun,” Chicken Road begins innocently. Then suddenly, you’re squawking and leaping for dear life, surrounded by enough fire to make a firefighter sweat, and calculating whether your next jump is a quick fortune or an express ticket to poultry purgatory. And all of this because someone, somewhere decided real chickens didn’t suffer enough indignity.