Category: Crypto news

Their big ask? That the SEC, and specifically Commissioner Hester Peirce (who probably has the world’s most unread inbox), put some rules in place about staking that don’t, you know, squash all innovation or send crypto enthusiasts fleeing to the Scandinavian forests to build servers from birch bark.

Enter Solana, Litecoin, and the ever-fashionable crypto index funds, adorned in paperwork and optimism, each cartwheeling into 2025 with what Bloomberg affectionately calls a “90% chance” of approval. Yes, Grayscale, Bitwise, and Franklin filed their applications with the gusto of a Moscow cabaret. If giggling in the face of bureaucracy were an Olympic sport, these firms would medal.

And let’s be honest, the whole point of this stablecoin thing is to actually use it for stuff – not just watch it sit in your digital wallet collecting dust. But of course, it’s not just Visa jumping on the crypto train. Oh no, Best Wallet Token ($BEST) is already planning its Best Card to make crypto transactions as easy as a morning coffee. ☕💰

Our dear $SOL finds itself gathering courage at the $145 doorstep, glancing up at the stony visages of $170 and $180, as if trying to woo a pair of cold-hearted aunts out of giving it the evil eye. Bitcoin, ever the stoic uncle, looks much better behaved on its charts—perhaps too simple, as if pretending not to notice the commotion below. Should $SOL’s bulls manage to leap the descending banister and the horizontal hurdles, we might be in for a riotous season of bullish festivities. Or perhaps just more sideways sighing. Who can tell with family?

He took to X (formerly Twitter, formerly that app you deleted, then reinstalled, then regretted reinstalling) to declare that the US is only just getting started on a “severe deceleration”—which is economist-speak for “the economy’s about to do the splits, and not the sexy kind.”

So, what’s the deal with HexyDog (HEXY)? Sneaking past all the speculative meme coins, HEXY’s practically doing the crypto equivalent of bringing tea and scones to the investor’s meeting. $400k raised and counting: that’s enough kibble to keep every Labrador in London happy for approximately three hours. The project is all about building out real features—think fintech for furballs—while eyeing the pet industry, which, let’s face it, is somehow always expanding, probably due to the world’s endless appetite for tiny sweaters and Instagrammable dog birthdays.

With the Trump administration gently nudging the crypto door open, and banks suddenly warming up to digital assets like your mum trying oat milk for the first time, it seems everyone’s ready for a financial glow-up. Enter Solana Policy Institute, Superstate, and our friend Orca, strutting out Project Open with the sort of swagger not seen since someone suggested putting pineapple on pizza. Their plan? Jolt equities onto the blockchain for instant settlements, snoop-proof transparency (so nosey, yet so necessary), and much-needed cuts to market costs.

On May 1st, at Token2049 (the Oscars of crypto, minus the free booze and seat fillers), Justin Sun—Tron (TRX) founder, serial disruptor, and owner of the world’s largest collection of red track suits—announced a juicy partnership with World Liberty Financial (yes, the Trump-backed one). USD1 stablecoin will now prance its way across the Tron blockchain.

Our gallant BTC hath capered nearly 20% from the gloomy dungeons of April (where it sulked at $79,000), cheered onward by $381 million in ETF coinage pouring in—enough to make Scrooge McDuck envious!—and the grand pronouncements of President Trump, whose recent pirouette on China trade makes even the finest court jesters blush. 🤡