BTC Soars $3K! Fed’s Whisper Sparks Crypto Chaos 🚀

Apocalyptic volatility in the cryptocurrency markets continues, as bitcoin, that fickle darling of the speculative, rebounded by over three grand after plunging below $81,000 to mark a new seven-month low-just an hour ago, no less! A feat of such speed that even the most ardent optimist might pause to question their life choices.

The most evident reason behind this immediate increase? The US Federal Reserve, that paragon of economic wisdom, whose pronouncements are now treated with the reverence once reserved for religious texts. John Williams, president of the New York branch, offered hope that the central bank might yet lower rates “in the near term,” a phrase that has become the financial world’s equivalent of “I’m fine, really.”

Though he admitted inflation progress has “temporarily stalled,” he believes there’s a way for the Fed to lower rates again soon and also aim for the 2% long-term goal. A goal so distant, it might as well be the moon, but let us not let facts spoil a good narrative.

“I view monetary policy as being modestly restrictive…Therefore, I still see room for further adjustment in the near term to the target range for the federal funds rate to move the stance of policy closer to the range of neutral, thereby maintaining the balance between the achievement of our two goals,” he concluded. -A masterclass in bureaucratic vagueness, delivered with the urgency of a man explaining why he’s late to his own funeral.

His remarks came after reports claiming the central bank might not lower rates during its December meeting, due to the delayed economic data for October and November. A delay so profound, it would make a sloth blush.

The odds on Polymarket also displayed the recent changes, as the no-rate-cut option had skyrocketed to over 60% in the past few days. However, the roles reversed after Williams’ speech, and now the 25 bps cut option is up to 62%. A shift so dramatic, it’s as if the market had finally remembered it was supposed to be a rollercoaster.

Bitcoin also priced in his words immediately, going from its multi-month low of $80,600 to $84,000 in minutes, where it faced some resistance. Nevertheless, the asset has been falling hard for the past few weeks, going from over $107,000 on November 11 to the aforementioned low of under $81,000. A descent so steep, it could give a rollercoaster whiplash.

2025-11-21 17:35

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