Bitcoin’s Doom? Top Investor Speaks Out! 😱

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Right. So, the wobbly lines on the charts – you know, the ones that people stare at intently hoping they’ll predict the future (they won’t) – are currently flashing more warnings than a dwarf convention after a questionable mushroom stew. And who should be adding his two-penny worth? None other than Peter Schiff, a man who regards Bitcoin with the same affection he reserves for tax auditors and pigeons. He suggests the peak, that elusive summit of digital foolishness, might have already scurried past. Oh dear.

Now, Mr. Schiff, bless his gold-plated heart, prefers things you can hold. Like gold. Very solid. Not… electric magic internet money. He was musing over a rather elaborate pictorial comparison involving past late-year surges (because everything follows a pattern, right? Except people) and our current slightly-overexcited rally. Apparently, Bitcoin once decided to be 720% more itself in 2013. A truly remarkable figure. It also managed 350% in 2017 and a comparatively modest 59% in 2021. Honestly, the percentages seem to be making things up as they go along.

It might be. The top must be made at some point so it may have already been made.

– Peter Schiff (@PeterSchiff) August 30, 2025

This latest rally is resorting to a mere triple-digit increase. Pathetic, really, compared to those glory days. When pointedly inquired upon whether the peak had indeed been scaled, Mr. Schiff offered a statement so concise, so brimming with understated glee, it nearly shook the foundations of the financial world. (It didn’t. But one can dream.)

It’s all part of a grand, convoluted theory about everything

Schiff recently prophesied that gold will ascend to the lofty heights of $6,000. A reasonable ambition, for a metal. He also warned that the dollar might take a tumble down to 70, which is apparently a historically low level (because numbers!). He’s bracing for chaos in gold, silver, and the stock market once everyone returns from their holidays. Because holidays are naturally followed by financial ruin. It’s a law of nature.

The two camps, naturally, are dug in for a prolonged staring contest. Bitcoin enthusiasts wave vaguely at historical data and murmur about “cycles” and “disruptive potential.” It sounds impressive, mostly.

Schiff, being a man of unwavering convictions (and a fondness for shiny things), remains stubbornly optimistic about where gold is headed, and equally pessimistic about the longevity of Bitcoin. He firmly believes they move in opposite directions. Which is logical, if you assume the universe is governed by a mischievous imp with a fondness for irony. 🧐

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2025-08-31 15:21