Bitcoin Bottomed? Arthur Hayes Thinks It’s Primed for a Spectacular Rally!

Our chums on the financial front have been abuzz, and none other than the dashing Arthur Hayes – BitMEX impresario and self-declared crystal ball gazer – has strutted forth, declaring with the confidence of a man who’s found his lucky cufflinks that the nadir for Bitcoin (BTC) is firmly behind us. Yes indeed, more zig-zags upwards are on the docket thanks to a veritable cocktail of macro shenanigans.

In a riveting little piece posted to his Substack – which, one might say, is the digital equivalent of a drawing room chat with a side of cheekiness – Hayes opines that President Trump has rather spectacularly waved the white flag in his tariff brouhaha, having likely overshot the mark in the first place.

According to our sage, the White House’s volte-face implies that the murky fog of market uncertainty is starting to clear, and the bottom? Oh, that lovely little number was measured in early April, skulking just beneath the lofty $75,000 plateau.

The head honcho of Maelstrom’s investment squad proposes that Bitcoin will soon be the belle of the financial ball, gathering enthusiastic bids all because the Federal Reserve is expected to crank up the money printer to soothe rattled bond markets. (One can almost hear the “Brrrrr” soundtrack playing in the background.)

“Yes… I’m calling the local bottom at $74,500,” he says, as if announcing the winner of a very high-stakes poker game.

“Whether you see Trump’s tariff pivot as a strategic retreat or an oopsie-daisy, the truth is the administration pulled off a financial market avalanche worthy of any black diamond ski run – so fierce that even they reconsidered their moves a week later. Now, as market sleuths, we comprehend what a bond market freakout looks like, know precisely which levels send everyone scurrying, and are well aware of the monetary buttons that get pushed to keep the spectacle in check.

With this intel tucked under our hats, bitcoin hodlers and crypto degenerates alike recognize the bottom has been inked. Next time Trump stirs up the tariff pot or digs in his heels, Bitcoin will dance a merry jig ahead of the central bankers firing up their money-printing presses to a rousing crescendo.”

As for the pièce de résistance, Hayes foresees BTC hitting a crescendo somewhere shy of the $200,000 mark, which might just be the cue for investors to pirouette out of Bitcoin and dip their toes into the riskier crypto piscatorial waters.

“And the shitcoins?”

“Once Bitcoin breaches its previous all-time high at $110,000, expect it to turbocharge, asserting its dominance. Perhaps it won’t quite touch $200,000. And then, ladies and gents, the grand rotation commences — the journey from Bitcoin into the wild wild west of altcoins.”

At the moment of this scribbling, Bitcoin is galloping along at $93,667—a sprightly 10.7% up in the last week, proving once again that where Bitcoin leads, the crypto merry-go-round follows with reckless abandon. 🎢💰

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2025-04-23 21:29

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