Arizona’s Bitcoin Bonanza: Politicians Get Crypto Fever, Taxpayers Left Untouched!

Oh, darling, pour the martini and fetch the smelling salts—Arizona’s making headlines! The Grand Canyon State, renowned for its sunburns and retirement homes, has sashayed into the role of America’s second trailblazing Bitcoin hoarder—how wonderfully nouveau riche of them. 🎩💼

Governor Katie Hobbs, evidently not content to merely sign birthday cards, has flourished her pen across House Bill 2749. This scintillating morsel of legislation scoops up all those orphaned digital fortunes after three years of being ignored—the fiscal equivalent of claiming unwatered houseplants. Meanwhile, New Hampshire is still dabbing its brow after its own similar bill. I suppose they’re attempting to outdo each other in the modern scavenger hunt for virtual treasure.

The act conjures up an official Bitcoin and Digital Asset Reserve Fund, which shall, in an act of sheer financial wizardry, accumulate value from staking rewards and airdrops—with nary a taxpayer’s penny in sight. Behold: government efficiency, or at least the illusion thereof. 🪙✨

Chairman Weninger, positively emoting at the press release, declared, “Digital assets aren’t the future—they’re the present.” That’s one for the motivational posters. Apparently Arizona is now determined not to let any value sit unattended like a sad, unclaimed canapé at a cocktail party, but instead to take the national lead in securing, managing, and profiting from digital currency that even its rightful owners have forgotten. Truly, a public service of the highest order.

Julian Fahrer, self-proclaimed Bitcoin law virtuoso, piped up on X (as the poets call it these days), giddily suggesting that Hobbs might also put her signature on Senate Bill 1373, a document currently languishing on her desk like an unpaid utility bill.

Should the mood strike her, SB 1373 gives Arizona’s treasurer—Kimberly Yee, for anyone keeping score—the divine opportunity to park up to 10% of the budget stabilization fund in Bitcoin. Because if you’re going to gamble, one may as well do it with style and a bit of government money.

Not to be left in the dust, New Hampshire’s latest manoeuvre means yet more public servants peering into the glorious, befuddling world of cryptocurrencies worth over $500 billion. Truly, everyone wants a seat at the madcap crypto casino. Place your bets, Arizona; Lady Luck won’t wait forever! 🎲💸

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2025-05-08 10:52

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