Altcoins? Seriously?

Okay, so the crypto market decided to have a mood swing mid-week. Bullish one minute, bearish the next. It’s exhausting, really. 😩 And now they’re telling me the weekend is even worse? High volatility? Like I don’t have enough to worry about.

BeInCrypto, these guys, they picked out three altcoins to “watch.” Watch them do what? Lose all my money? I’m just saying… 🙄

Conflux (CFX)

Apparently, CFX is up 85% this week. 85%! Like, who even *bought* this? And now they expect it to go *higher*? It’s at $0.188. $0.188! It’s practically free money, right? Right? 🤨 They’re talking about “Golden Crosses” and “EMAs.” Honestly, it sounds like some sort of complicated origami. If it goes above $0.194, it’s headed to $0.240. Oh, good. More numbers. But if people get scared, it could fall to $0.146. Of course. Why wouldn’t it? It’s always something.

And they say “investor confidence is key.” Investor confidence! Like that’s a readily available resource. What am I supposed to do, *will* it to exist?

Pudgy Penguins (PENGU)

Pudgy Penguins. Seriously? That’s a crypto name? 🐧 Down 12% today, trading at $0.037. It tried to hit a “high” of $0.046 and failed. Failed! It’s like watching someone try to parallel park. Painful. They’re using words like “waning momentum.” Waning! Like it’s a candle. 🕯️

But…maybe it will go up again. They have an “indicator” that suggests it *could*. Could! It’s always could, never *will*. If things “stabilize”–which they never do–it might pass that $0.046 thing. Or it could drop to $0.029. I’m sensing a pattern here. 🤦

Pump.fun (PUMP)

Pump.fun. Oh, the irony. Down 25%. Of course it is. $0.00258. That’s, like, less than a penny. What am I supposed to do with that? Buy a gumball? 🍬 They say it could fall to $0.00212. It’s just…deflating. Everything is just *deflating*.

But! It recovered a little. A little! So maybe it’ll get to $0.00292 and then… $0.00380. A whole three-tenths of a cent! I feel richer already. No, I don’t.

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2025-07-25 22:51

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