So, this guy, Denis Angell – a software engineer, fancy! – at XRPL Labs and Xahau, is saying these “Smart Contracts” are available for developers. On AlphaNet. AlphaNet! Like, what is AlphaNet? Is it, like, a test kitchen for code? 🙄 It’s always something with these tech people.
The XRP Ledger Smart Contracts feature is now available for developers to explore and test on AlphaNet, a dedicated development network.
This groundbreaking implementation brings native Layer 1 smart contract capabilities to the XRPL, combining the familiar design patterns of…
– Denis Angell 🎩🔥 (@angell_denis) November 7, 2025
Apparently, it’s a “milestone.” Everything’s a milestone these days. It “introduces native Layer-1 smart contract capabilities.” What does that even mean? It’s just a lot of buzzwords, frankly. And it merges “EVM-style contracts” with XRPL…sounds complicated. I need a nap. 😴
Just like every other chain…you can build apps. Decentralized apps. Unbelievable. Groundbreaking. We’ve never heard that before. 🤦
And they’re aiming for a Q1 2026 release for something called “Smart Escrows.” Q1! That’s like…months away. I’ll probably be yelling at a cloud by then. It allows you to write “custom release conditions.” Like a complicated, digital IOU? Seriously?
What’s coming?
Okay, so this is a “new shift.” Of course it is. Everything is a shift. Apparently, you don’t need “UNL approval.” That’s good, I guess. Less bureaucracy. But they get “direct access to all XRPL features.” Sounds…risky. It’s like giving a toddler a power tool.
They’ll support multiple programming languages! And “on-chain ABIs.” Look, I just want to know if I can still buy coffee with this stuff. ☕
And then they list all these possibilities! Bridges, DeFi, token utilities…governance systems…gaming…NFT marketplaces! It’s insane. All these use cases. It’s exhausting just thinking about it. Honestly, who has time for all this?
XRP Ledger hits 99.999% uptime record
Ninety-nine point nine nine nine percent uptime! Okay, that’s pretty good. But what about the .001%? That’s where the problems happen! They surpassed 100 million Ledgers. Millions! What even is a Ledger? It’s just numbers, right? 🔢
And 21,595 new wallets in 48 hours. People are just throwing their money at this thing. It’s… worrying. Eight months of growth! They’re so excited about growth. I’m excited about a comfortable chair.
This “crypto influencer” is saying they’ve only been down for 74 minutes in 13.4 years. Seventy-four minutes of downtime?! That’s practically an eternity in internet years! Two outages! A software bug and a…consensus freeze?! What does THAT even mean?! It sounds…cold. 🥶
Since 2012, they’ve been down twice. Twice! People are obsessed with this stuff. It’s really something.
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2025-11-09 03:34