Dash Goes Bananas! 🚀🤑 Is This the Crypto Comeback of the Century?

by

So, Dash decided to have a little party, huh? 🎉 Up 80%? Who does this coin think it is, the king of the crypto prom? Last time I checked, it was just sitting there, minding its own business, and now it’s all like, “Look at me, I’m parabolic!” 🤷‍♂️

  • Dash price soared over 80% on Tuesday. Big deal. My aunt’s cat could’ve predicted that. 🐱
  • Aster listed Dash last week. Oh, so now everyone’s best friends? Where were you when Dash was down bad, huh? 🤨
  • Technical signals say it’s going up. Well, duh. Even my barista could’ve told you that. ☕

According to crypto.news, Dash hit $147.86. Whoa, slow down, Mr. Fancy Pants. Settled at $130.31? Classic Dash, can’t even hold its high. Up 167% in a week? Must be nice. My 401(k) wishes it had that kind of energy. 💸

Market cap tripled to $1.62 trillion? Sure, Jan. Spot volume up 73%? Yawn. Wake me up when it’s a trillion. 😴

Privacy coins are all the rage now? Great, so now everyone’s a spy? Zcash up 183%? Wow, Zcash, you must be so proud. Railgun and Horizen also rallying? Who invited them to the party? 🎈

Aster listed Dash? Big whoop. Exchange listings are like a Tinder match-exciting for a day, then back to reality. 5x leverage? Sounds like someone’s asking for a margin call. 📉

Why is Dash’s price doing so well this month? 🤔📈

Because it finally remembered it exists? Just kidding. Sort of. Dash, you’ve been working hard? For years? And this is your big moment? Good for you, buddy. 🥳

Thread time! 🧵

Here are five big achievements we’ve had over the…

– Dash (@Dashpay) November 1, 2025

Futures open interest spiked to $105.5 million? Oh, so now everyone’s interested? Where were you when it was $8 million, huh? Fair-weather fans. 🌦️

Dash has Masternodes? Fancy. InstaSend and PrivateSend? Sounds like a dating app for crypto. Swipe right for instant transactions, swipe left for privacy. 💳

Dash price analysis

Technical indicators say Dash is strong? Sure, whatever. MACD lines trending up? Aroon Up at 100%? RSI overbought? Sounds like a lot of mumbo jumbo to me. 📊

Next resistance at $158.46? Good luck with that. Last time it tried, it face-planted harder than I did at my high school reunion. If it hits $193.76, I’ll eat my hat. 🧢

Support at $78.30? Yeah, sure. If it drops below that, it’s going all the way down to $18. Might as well call it Dash-and-burn. 🔥

Read More

2025-11-04 13:41