Oh, what a farce unfolds in the grand theater of cryptomania, mes amis! A mere Shiba Inu metric, that whimsical beast of speculation, hath ascended by a monstrous 836,955%, dazzling the fools and knaves of the crypto realm. ‘Tis the burn rate, you see, wherein Shiba tokens are hurled into the abyss of unrecoverable oblivion, and lo, it hath erupted in the span of a mere sun’s journey!
From the oracle Shibburn, comes the decree: a soar of 836,955.45% in these last 24 hours. Yet, verily, the tokens immolated number scant less than a million-nay, merely 920,761 SHIB tokens. How pitiful, how absurd! For such magniloquent surges bespoke millions in flame, but here, a mere trickle ignites a tempest. 🙄💀
HOURLY SHIB UPDATE
$SHIB Price: $0.00000997 (1hr 0.34% ▲ | 24hr -2.66% ▼ )
Market Cap: $5,876,050,837 (-2.67% ▼)
Total Supply: 589,247,302,070,496TOKENS BURNT
Past 24Hrs: 920,761 (836955.45% ▲)
Past 7 Days: 229,661,612 (1290.42% ▲)– Shibburn (@shibburn) October 21, 2025
Normally, such hyperbolic spikes demand legions of tokens sacrificed like pagan offerings, but a 836,955.45% lunge from 920,761 SHIB? ‘Tis unprecedented folly, stirring the rabble and their greasy palms! Sarcasm aside, it follows a paltry 110 tokens burned the day before yester, yielding this dizzying ascent. And in seven days, a sum of 229,661,612 SHIB hath been charred, a 1,290.42% leap-oh, the comedy of burnt coins! 🔥😏
What to Behold, You Gaping Spectators
As I quill this satire, SHIB doth wane by 3.18% in 24 hours to $0.000009911, amidst a market rout claiming $319 million in liquidated dreams. The weekend’s mirthful crypto rebound halts Monday, as investors ponder the dread, with the Crypto Fear & Greed Index wallowing in “fear”-truly, a stage for tragedians! 😱📉
Eyes fix upon the government’s absurd shutdown, with whispers it may conclude ere long. This spectacle hath starved us of data, yet on Friday, the consumer price index shall reveal itself, delayed and pompous, a gauge for inflation’s caprice before the Federal Reserve’s fateful decree next week. Mon Dieu, what a mascarade! 🎭
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2025-10-21 14:53