Crypto Schemers Get Served 🤑

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Ah, the hubris of the modern swindler. How it warms the cockles of my heart to see them brought low by the weight of their own deceit. And so, it is with great relish that I report on the downfall of the “My Big Coin” crypto scheme, a veritable house of cards built on lies, damned lies, and bogus claims of gold backing. 💸

The Commodity Futures Trading Commission (CFTC), that great bastion of regulatory virtue, has secured a judgment against the perpetrators of this digital asset scheme. Mark Gillespie, John Roche, and their respective companies, My Big Coin Pay Inc. and My Big Coin Inc., have been found liable for defrauding customers to the tune of $6 million. A paltry sum, perhaps, but one that represents the life savings of at least 28 individuals, no doubt left destitute by the false promises of these crypto charlatans.

The order requires Gillespie, My Big Coin Pay Inc., My Big Coin Inc., and Roche to pay jointly and severally a $19,326,324 civil monetary penalty and $6,442,108 in restitution to defrauded victims in connection with their role in a digital asset fraud scheme.

But alas, dear reader, the chances of these victims recovering their losses are slim indeed. The defendants, it seems, have no assets to speak of, having squandered the ill-gotten gains on who-knows-what frivolities. And so, the CFTC warns, restitution is uncertain, leaving the victims to pick up the pieces of their shattered financial dreams.

And yet, despite this cautionary tale, the crypto enthusiasts remain undeterred. They argue that regulatory clarity, not broad skepticism, is essential to the growth and legitimacy of blockchain-based finance. Ah, but what of the legitimacy of the human heart, prone as it is to greed, deception, and all manner of financial skullduggery? Can any amount of regulation hope to contain the boundless ingenuity of the crypto scammer? 🤑

A placeholder image, representing the empty promises of the crypto schemer

But I digress. The judgment, at least, is a step in the right direction. It serves as a reminder that, no matter how complex the scheme, no matter how convincing the lies, justice will ultimately be served. And so, to all you crypto schemers out there, take heed: the law is coming for you, and it will not be gentle. 😏

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2025-06-13 07:57