Strategy’s $1 Billion Deal: Bitcoin Dreams or Brilliant Scam? 🤔💰

Oh, darling readers, gather ’round because Michael Saylor’s Bitcoin obsession, Strategy, has just decided to sprinkle extra fairy dust on its latest deal. Originally planning to grab a modest $250 million, they’ve now upped the ante to a whopping billion. Yes, you heard that right—one full billion dollars! 💸

Raising forecasted proceeds from $250 million to $1 billion

In the grand tradition of pulling numbers out of thin air (or perhaps from a very deep wallet), Strategy laid out the details. They’re offering 11,764,700 shares of their shiny Series A Perpetual Stride Preferred Stock (STRD). Each unit is a cool $85—because apparently, investing in Bitcoin and dreams is all about the price tags. These beauties will be issued on June 10.

And hold onto your hats, folks, because the target number has soared! Instead of the humble $205 million initially floated, Strategy now expects to rake in approximately $979.7 million—because why settle for less when you’re aiming for the stars? All this cash will be spent on general corporate expenses, including that little hobby of theirs—buying more Bitcoin. Because, of course, that’s the real plan. 🪙

Oh, and did I mention? Shareholders will get to enjoy a tidy 10% dividend annually, starting from the fall of 2025. Quarterly dividends, of course, because what’s life without a little regular income from a stock that’s probably a giant glorified Bitcoin roulette wheel? And just in case the tax gods aren’t feeling particularly generous, Strategy reserves the right to redeem STRD if certain tax events happen. Because, darling, nothing screams stability like a bit of tax-related contingency planning.

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2025-06-06 15:17