Altcoins Stampede Past Bitcoin! The Surprising Winners & Losers You Won’t Believe

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My dear crypto aficionados, prepare clutching your pearls or at least your portfolios—a resplendent 2.79% surge has swept our dearly befuddled cryptocurrency market, wafting it to a rather theatrical $3.01 trillion. And the culprits behind this soirée? Altcoins, charging ahead with the gusto of a chorus line, as venerable old Bitcoin and Ethereum put on their bravest stiff upper lips. 🕺💰

Crypto Market Smashes Through $3.01 Trillion – Champagne All Round, Darlings!

Bitcoin (BTC), the perennial major-domo of the digital asset ball, is still playing elegant host with a 64.4% market share—up 3.25%, price-tagged at a positively aristocratic $97,302 per coin. Apparently, the institutional set still believes BTC is the Ritz of cryptos. Ethereum (ETH)—only 7.4% of the party, bless it—parried a 3.20% rise to $1,827, weathering the minor scandals and hiccups that would have sent most debutantes home early.

STX/ USDT via Binance on May 7. (Caviar not included.)

Now, onto the supporting cast: Those deliciously dramatic altcoins! Stacks (STX) pirouetted up 15.4%—just imagine the footwork—costuming itself at $0.8794, and claiming bronze on the day’s “I’m Relevant, Too!” podium. EOS, desperately clutching its program, managed a close 13.6% rise to $0.778. Elsewhere, convex finance (CVX) waltzed 13.13% upward, brett (BRETT) tiptoed in at 11.24%, and popcat (POPCAT)—I assume someone’s pet is behind this—leaped 10.8% against expectation and perhaps common sense. 🐾

KAITO/ USDT via Binance on May 7. (All applause graciously accepted.)

But give your most theatrical gasp for Kaito (KAITO): This veritable understudy rocketed 48.06%—presumably after mainlining espresso—to $1.262475. Not to be upstaged, the meme brigade put on quite their own review: Mog coin (MOG) up 17.12%, and, positively barking mad, Bitcoin’s dog token (DOG) jumped a full 10.5%.

Of course, not every player survived the matinee. Movement (MOVE) tripped and fell headlong by 10.29% to $0.1613 (one hopes the landing was soft). Fartcoin (FARTCOIN)—perhaps a little too on the nose—wafted down 10.25%, while virtual protocol (VIRTUAL) swooned 8%. The supporting cast—fellaz (FLZ), safe token (SAFE), and beldex (BDX)—joined them at the downstairs bar, sporting melancholic air and possibly floppy hats.

Still, darling, the curtain call today belongs to the altcoins—the audience is rapt, the excitement palpable, and the major caps are left mumbling in the wings. Encore!

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2025-05-07 19:30