Crypto Banned in Congress?! Politicians Panic Over New Anti-Corruption Bill 🤯🤑

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Hold onto your hats (and wallets)! Congress is rolling out the “End Crypto Corruption Act”—a mouthful, and just as fun as a root canal. Basically, the bill says the President, Vice President, and every official high enough to get a parking spot (plus their families) can’t touch, hype, or invest in any crypto project. If they do? It’s a million-dollar penalty! 💸 That’s right, break the rules and you might have to return those sweet, sweet laser-eyed profits too.

insiders playing regulatory Twister while scooping up tokens left and right. He wants the loophole closed before someone starts selling “MerkleCoin” on Etsy.

Schumer: “Keep Your Hands Off My Blockchain!”

Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer (no relation to Amy—though he’d probably like the residuals) is getting in on the action, too. He warns that letting politicians mint their own tokens could twist democracy into a pretzel.

“If people bankroll politicians with these tokens, we might as well start auctioning off Senate seats on eBay,” Schumer declared.
With crypto going mainstream, the Democrats want a clear line between “serving the people” and “serving up hot stock tips at Thanksgiving.” 🍗💰

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2025-05-07 15:19