Scandal! BlackRock Secretly Amasses Billions in Bitcoin—You Won’t Believe the Numbers!
Dear Reader,
It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single asset manager in possession of vast capital, must be in want of a little more Bitcoin 💸. And so it is with BlackRock, whose recent disclosures—far from demure—have rather set tongues wagging and investors fanning themselves in disbelief.
Upon perusal of the latest quarterly declaration (one might call it a letter of confession!), one is astounded to discover the rise of BlackRock’s iShares Bitcoin Trust—styled IBIT, for those acquainted with such abbreviations—from a modest 2,605,102 shares to a positively immodest 5,853,406 shares. This accounts for an increase of 3,248,304 shares, valued at the rather eye-watering sum of $273,997,913 as of 31st March, 2025. I daresay, Mr. Darcy never carried so profitable a secret!
The narrative thickens: BlackRock, ever the diligent fortune hunter, has acquired 70,971 shares of the mysterious FBTC, rumoured to be Fidelity’s Bitcoin ETF. Its value—$5,107,783—may not set Pemberley alight, but it does pay the bills. There are also minor positions in GBTC and its rather diminutive sibling, GBTC Mini. Truly, there is no trust too small for BlackRock’s purse or pride.
Let us not forget MicroStrategy! Once a humble suitor, now quite the object of BlackRock’s affections. Their shares have swelled from 11,261,801 to 14,418,806—a courtship worthy of a gothic novel—carrying with them the princely sum of $4.15 billion. I suppose one must woo fortune wherever she lingers!
For additional amusement, we see BlackRock dabbling in Bitcoin mining companies (RIOT Platforms, Marathon Digital, and the like). One presumes their drawing rooms now ring with the clatter of digital picks and shovels.
In summation, BlackRock’s Bitcoin-related treasures total an astonishing $5,432,767,296. Such a figure is enough to send even the most composed of matrons to her fainting couch. Alas, their appetite for digital riches appears insatiable—one can only marvel at such modern-day audacity! 🚀
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2025-05-05 14:49