๐Ÿค‘ North Carolina Goes Wild: Pay Your Taxes in Bitcoin While Uncle Sam Watches in Horror!

Oh, dearest reader, in this peculiar theatre of fiscal absurdity, North Carolina has birthed a most curious proposition! Like snow in April, lawmakers have scattered their legislative dreams across the chamber floor. ๐ŸŽญ

Picture this, my friends: Representative Neal Jackson, that brave soul, has penned House Bill 920 – a masterpiece of modern bureaucracy that would let us common folk throw our digital coins into the state’s coffers! Oh, what would Pushkin say? ๐Ÿ˜‚

With all the gravity of a Russian winter, they declare: “Digital assets, when properly regulated…” (Don’t you just love how they always add that little ‘properly regulated’ caveat? As if chaos itself could be tamed!) ๐ŸŒจ๏ธ

But wait! Not all crypto is worthy of this grand gesture. No, no! The asset must wear a crown worth $750 billion and dance to the tune of $10 billion daily trades. How wonderfully arbitrary, like measuring poetry in rubles! ๐Ÿ’ฐ

Bitcoin, that golden child of the digital age, sits alone on this throne of requirements, while Ethereum weeps in the corner like a forgotten samovar. Poor ETH, so close yet so far, with its mere $188 billion market cap! ๐ŸŽญ

The requirements read like a Russian novel – ten years of existence without state support (oh, the irony!), no pre-mining (as pure as fresh snow), and absolutely no oligarchs pulling strings behind velvet curtains! ๐ŸŽช

And just when you thought the drama couldn’t get more intense, they insist the token must be declared a commodity, not a security – as if the SEC’s blessing were some sort of divine intervention! ๐Ÿ™

Meanwhile, in another wing of this grand theater, North Carolina dreams of throwing pension funds into the crypto circus – because apparently, traditional investments aren’t exciting enough! What’s next, paying property taxes in digital paintings of bored primates? ๐ŸŽจ

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2025-04-11 14:19