Karamazovian Report: 98.6% of Solana Meme Coins Are Mostly Fraud, You Say? Are You Surprised, Alyosha?
SolanaâWhere Meme Dreams Become Dostoevskian Nightmares đą
The âreportââdoes it still amaze you, gentle reader?âbears the inauspicious name Solidus Labsâ 2025 Rug Pull Report. More than 7 million tokens, as elusive as Raskolnikovâs conscience, were anatomized upon Pump.funâs surgical table betwixt January 2024 and March 2025. And what did the piercing scalpel find? Fewer than 100,000 tokensâless than the population of an unambitious provincial townâpossessed liquidity exceeding $1,000. The infamous bonding curve model, that cunning mathematical contraption, lifts the price for each scrambling, desperate buyer. Perhaps a metaphor for life, or at least for Ponzi schemes.
Meanwhile, on Raydiumâthink of it as Solanaâs roguish cousinâmatters are similarly bleak. Of 388,000 liquidity pools examined (one wonders if even Ivan Karamazov could count so high unaided), a full 93% demonstrated the subtle artistry of the âsoft rug pull.â Developers vanish like Dostoevskyâs debts, leaving traders to contemplate their losses: a median $2,832âenough for a stifling garret in St. Petersburg, or perhaps a very disappointing dinner. One particularly ambitious scoundrel absconded with $1.9 millionâpossibly dreaming of Siberia.
Authorities, sensing a Dostoevskian dramaâmoral chaos reigning, the tension between redemption and punishmentâbegan to stir. The SEC and DOJ, donning their own prosecutorâs hats, have taken up the hunt. New York lawmakers now discuss criminalizing code-based fraud. Meteora, a Solana DEX, was accused in a class action for a rug pull so spectacularâ$69 million!âthat even Fyodor would pause his pen to gawk.
Institutions, so dignified in public, now fidget nervously. DOJâs April 2025 warning memo suggests the guillotine may swing for platforms who ignore fraud (donât lose your heads, gentlemen). Solidus Labs recommends monitoring, like the ever-vigilant Porfiry Petrovich, using tools such as Token Sniffer to spot larceny before it blossoms. But will they? Or, like our friend Dmitri, will they only wake up after the silver has gone missing? đľď¸ââď¸
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2025-05-08 19:12