Justice Department Finally Gets Off Crypto’s Back—No More Regulation by Prosecution!

Lo and behold! An intricate manuscript, christened “Ending Regulation by Prosecution,” has emerged, illuminating the shadows of its predecessors’ policies that shockingly unjustly treated digital assets as an avenue for malevolent undertakings: fraud, terrorism, and even the nefarious ways of human smuggling. Prosecutors, now dispelled from their former obsessions, will refrain from levying charges merely for “regulatory violations” in the digital asset domain. It is as if the Justice Department has at last donned the robes of sanity! 😏

Jurassic Park’s major ending change finally explained 32 years later

1993’s Steven Spielberg movie features Richard Attenborough as the CEO of InGen and ingenious designer of Jurassic Park, a dinosaur-themed island attraction. After a rogue computer programmer named Dennis Nedry (Wayne Knight) releases the dinosaurs, Attenborough, along with his grandchildren, manages to flee the island.

Trump & Crypto?! 🤯 Binance’s Wild Ride!

Apparently, Binance’s top brass, namely CEO Richard Teng and Chief Legal Officer Eleanor Hughes, have been politely (or perhaps as politely as one can be when asking for a favour from the government) requesting the removal of a watchdog. You know, the kind that keeps an eye on whether they’re accidentally laundering money for nefarious types. They’d also like to list a new dollar-pegged cryptocurrency from WLF. What could possibly go wrong? 🤷‍♀️