🤯 Bitcoin Whale Saylor Might Dump His Crypto Stash And I’m Pretty, Pretty Concerned!

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Let me tell you something about this Saylor guy, he’s got himself in quite the predicament, I tell ya! 🤦‍♂️ Pretty, pretty, pretty interesting situation here. This schmuck bought so much Bitcoin, you wouldn’t believe it – it’s like me hoarding soup at Monk’s Café during a pandemic!

So get this – Strategy, his company (and believe me, I use that term loosely), might have to sell their precious Bitcoin because they can’t pay their bills. I mean, what kind of meshuggeneh business plan is that? It’s like buying a house without checking if you have enough money for toilet paper! 🚽

Would You Believe These Losses? I Mean, Come On!

Six billion dollars in losses! SIX BILLION! That’s more money than Larry Fine made in his entire career! And trust me, I know about the Three Stooges – I’m somewhat of an expert. 🤓

Oy Vey, The Debt!

Eight billion in debt? That’s worse than when I bought that restaurant just to spite that other owner! And now they need to pay $35 million in interest? I get anxiety just thinking about my $10 late fee at the library! 😰

$MSTR has acquired 22,048 BTC… blah blah blah… Look at this guy, tweeting numbers like he’s Rain Man! 🧮

— Michael Saylor (@saylor) March 31, 2025

You know what this reminds me of? That time Cheryl invested in that “Palestinian chicken” restaurant without reading the fine print. Respect the investment, respect it! 🍗

And now Bitcoin’s at $76,100? That’s more volatile than my relationship with Susie! One day you’re up, next day she’s calling you a “four-eyed schmuck”! 😤

I’ll tell you what – this whole situation is giving me more anxiety than the time I accidentally walked into the Palestinian chicken place wearing my yamaka. And that’s saying something! 😅

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2025-04-10 03:13