🤑 Trump, Oil, and Bitcoin: A Wodehousean Farce! 🛢️

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Egad, what a to-do! This dashed weekend, old Trump-the fellow with the extraordinary coiffure-let slip that Venezuela’s Maduro had been bundled off like a forgotten umbrella, and that Washington would now be mucking about with the chap’s oil industry. Jolly bold move, what?

This little escapade has set the crypto chaps all aquiver, with that clever cove Arthur Hayes of BitMEX fame opining that cheaper oil and a spot of credit tomfoolery might just send Bitcoin soaring like a well-struck golf ball. Capital idea, if you ask me!

Trump’s Venezuelan Shenanigans: A Geopolitical Ruckus, But Crypto? Not a Blink! 🧐

The news popped up on January 3, when some chaps in Washington announced that Maduro and his better half had been nabbed after a spot of bother in Caracas. Trump, never one to miss a photo op, promptly spilled the beans on the telly. He also mentioned-rather casually, I thought-that the U.S. would be “strongly involved” in Venezuela’s oil business. This, naturally, sent the Twitterati and the trading desks into a right old tizzy.

Despite all the hullabaloo, Bitcoin barely batted an eyelid, slipping from just under $91,000 to a mere $89,000 before steadying itself like a gentleman after a stiff whiskey. By January 4, the old boy had rebounded to a multi-week high near $92,000, adding a cool $3,000 from its post-drama dip. Even those Trump-themed tokens got in on the act, showing a bit of speculative spunk while everyone waited for the oil futures to reopen.

Hayes, meanwhile, took to social media with a post that mixed satire and macro views like a bartender with a flair for the dramatic. Strip away the theatrics, though, and his point was as clear as a gin and tonic: U.S. politics, especially with the 2026 midterms and the 2028 presidential race looming, are as tied to economic conditions as Bertie Wooster is to his trusty manservant Jeeves. Keeping petrol prices low, Hayes reckons, is more important to voters than most policy drivel, and controlling Venezuelan oil could help Washington keep costs down while splashing credit about like a tipsy toff.

This, he believes, could lead to a spot of unchecked dollar creation, since with oil prices suppressed, there’ll be no market force to tell the politicians to “stop printing money.” In such a climate, Bitcoin, he says, will rise like a phoenix in response to the expanding dollar liquidity. 🌊💸

The chap even trotted out his “USD Liquidity Conditions Index” as evidence of this historical jolly-up, declaring, “Bitcoin’s rise is as direct as a Jeeves solution to a Wooster problem.” He contrasted this with traditional financial assets like government bonds, which become about as appealing as a cold bath on a winter’s morning if energy costs are high and volatile.

Oil and Bitcoin: A Match Made in Financial Farce? 💍🛢️

At the time of scribbling, Bitcoin was up a modest 1% on the day, nearly 7% over the last week, and close to 5% in the past month. The old chap traded between $92,000 and $94,600 in the last 24 hours, showing about as much volatility as a well-bred English gentleman at a tea party.

For now, the markets seem to be betting that U.S. control of Venezuelan oil will add supply rather than cause a ruckus. If that holds true, Hayes thinks loose fiscal policy could keep risk assets afloat like a cork in a champagne glass. 🥂

However, should crude prices climb and bond yields follow, the tone could change quicker than a Wooster scheme gone awry. Until then, Bitcoin’s calm demeanor suggests traders are more focused on the liquidity picture than the headlines. After all, as Jeeves might say, “One must always keep one’s eye on the ball, sir.”

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2026-01-06 18:12