🤑 Saylor’s Bitcoin Odyssey: Credit, Chaos, and Corporate Shenanigans 🤑

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Ah, the grand theater of finance! Behold, Michael Saylor, the modern-day Don Quixote, tilting at the windmills of Bitcoin critics with a fervor that would make even Woland raise an eyebrow. This week, our hero stepped back into the limelight, his voice booming like a chorus of cats in heat, defending the sacred Bitcoin treasury against the philistines of short-term thinking. 🦄✨

“Credit, my dear sirs and madams, is the lifeblood of empires!” he proclaimed, his eyes gleaming with the zeal of a man who has seen the face of God-or at least the blockchain. “Who cares about the price? It’s but a fleeting shadow in the grand ballet of financial power!” One could almost hear the ghost of Berlioz chuckling in the background. 👻💰

Bitcoin Treasuries: A Circus Under Siege

On the hallowed grounds of the What Bitcoin Did show, Saylor unleashed his manifesto. “Progress, my friends, is not found in the daily charts!” he declared, waving his hands like a conductor leading an orchestra of chaos. “It lurks in the shadows of institutions, credit markets, and the arcane rituals of accounting!” Truly, a man who speaks the language of the stars-or perhaps just the IRS. 🌌📊

Ah, 2025-a year misunderstood by the plebeians who fixated on pullbacks instead of the structural gains. Bitcoin, that fickle mistress, reached her zenith in October, only to retreat like a diva refusing an encore. Yet Saylor, undeterred, pointed to the corporate masses flocking to her altar. From 30 to 200 public companies holding Bitcoin on their balance sheets? A miracle, or merely the march of inevitability? 🤔🚀

And Strategy, that noble steed in Saylor’s crusade, galloped into the fray, purchasing $25 billion worth of Bitcoin in 2025 alone. Funded, of course, by the magical incantations of capital raises. In 2026, they continued their spree, dropping $1.25 billion on 13,627 BTC. One wonders if they’ve considered a garage sale for all that digital treasure. 🛒💎

Regulatory winds, too, blew in their favor. Fair-value accounting rules! Clearer tax guidance! By late 2025, even the stoic U.S. banks were extending credit against spot Bitcoin ETFs. The financial world, it seems, is finally catching up to Saylor’s vision-or perhaps just humoring him. 🤷‍♂️🏦

Credit, Optionality, and the Dance of Folly

At the heart of Saylor’s saga lies the distinction between operating companies and passive investment vehicles. “ETFs are but mere spectators,” he intoned, “while we, the chosen few, wield the power to issue debt, write credit products, and build financial cathedrals on our Bitcoin holdings!” One can almost hear the echoes of Koroviev’s laughter in the background. 🎭🏰

And what of those who complain about firms trading at discounts to net asset value? “Fools!” Saylor might say, though he was too polite. “They see only the trees, not the forest of management’s grand designs and future cash flows!” A man who sees the world not as it is, but as it could be-if only everyone would stop being so dreadfully short-sighted. 🌳🔮

“Too many Bitcoin treasury companies?” he scoffed, dismissing the notion with a wave of his hand. “Nonsense! It’s like saying there are too many lightbulbs. Even the dimmest can illuminate a corner of the world.” Though, he conceded, a poorly run firm is a poorly run firm, Bitcoin or no Bitcoin. A rare moment of pragmatism in a sea of zealotry. 💡🤦‍♂️

As for 2026, Saylor refused to play the soothsayer’s game. “Predicting Bitcoin’s price over 90 days? Absurd!” he declared. Instead, he painted a vision of digital capital weaving itself into the global credit system, a process as inevitable as the turning of the Earth. Whether the price cooperates? A mere detail in the grand tapestry of history. 🌍🧵

And so, our tale concludes-for now. Michael Saylor, the indefatigable champion of Bitcoin, continues his odyssey, undeterred by critics or chaos. Will his vision triumph, or will it all end in a puff of smoke and a chorus of “I told you so”? Only time, that great jester, will tell. ⏳🤡

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2026-01-13 21:56