🤑 Crypto Chaos: August’s Wildest Heists Exposed! 🕵️‍♂️

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Well, bless my soul, if it ain’t another month of crypto carnage! According to them smarty-pants at PeckShield, a cool $163 million in digital dough vanished into thin air in August. That’s right, folks-16 trading platforms got their pockets picked cleaner than a riverboat gambler’s deck of cards. 🃏

The Great Crypto Capers of August

Some poor sap, who shall remain nameless (unless they’re reading this-hello, friend!), got fleeced to the tune of $91.4 million in Bitcoin. That’s enough to make a man weep into his whiskey. 😭🥃

Then there’s BtcTurk, the Turkish titan of crypto, which got hit harder than a donkey in a minefield-$54 million gone, and this ain’t their first rodeo either. Seems like they’re handing out cash like it’s candy on Halloween. 🎃💸

And let’s not forget ODIN•FUN, the meme-coin maestro, which lost $7 million to some slick price-manipulating scoundrels. Guess the joke’s on them, eh? 🤡💰

Rounding out the top five are BetterBank and CrediX Finance, down $5 million and $4.5 million, respectively. Seems like the only thing better at BetterBank is their ability to lose money. 🤦‍♂️

The Trend That Keeps on Giving

Crypto losses are up 15% from July, jumping from $142 million to $163 million. That’s progress, I suppose-if you’re a thief. 🏆🦹‍♂️

Speaking of July, CoinDCX, the Indian exchange, took the crown for biggest loss that month with $44.2 million. Guess they were just warming up the hackers for August’s grand spectacle. 🎭💥

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2025-09-01 09:20