🤑💼 SEC & Gemini: “Let’s Chat ‘Bout That Lawsuit, Shall We?” 💼🤑

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Well, I’ll be a monkey’s uncle! The US Securities and Exchange Commission, them fine folks what police the stockyards, and Gemini, that there crypto corral, have gone and asked the judge to hit the pause button on their little tiff. “Let’s jaw a spell,” they say, “and see if we can’t patch things up.” 🗣️🤝

On the first of April—April Fool’s, mind you!—they sent a letter to Judge Edgardo Ramos, as suave as a riverboat gambler, asking for a 60-day breather. “Let’s push back all them deadlines,” they pleads, “so’s we can mull over a peace treaty.” 📜🕰️

“It’s in our best interests, Your Honor,” they writes, “to take a powder while we hash this out. And don’t you worry, nobody’s gonna get the short end of the stick.” 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♀️

The lawyers, slicker than a greased pig, pitches that a timeout’s a mighty fine idea for the court, too. “Save you some trouble, Your Honor,” they says. “We’ll file a report when we’re done jawing.” 📝🔍

Back in January of ’23, the SEC slung a lawsuit at Gemini and Genesis, them crypto cowboys, claiming they was peddling unregistered securities. Genesis, they caved and paid up $21 million, but Gemini’s still in the hot seat. 🤠💰

Now, the letter don’t say what kind of deal they’re cooking up, but the SEC’s been dropping lawsuits like hotcakes since Biden took the reins. Coinbase, Ripple, Kraken—they all got a pass. 🎉👋

In February, Gemini hollered that the SEC shut down a separate shakedown, what with the regulator easing off on crypto since Trump’s day. “The SEC cost us a pretty penny,” Gemini’s co-founder griped, “and not just in legal fees, neither.” 💸😠

OpenSea, Crypto.com, Uniswap—they’ve all had the SEC’s magnifying glass on ’em, but looks like the heat’s been turned down. For now, anyhow. 🌡️🔬

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2025-04-02 08:47