🚀 Lawyer Fights SEC, Cries Happy Tears as XRP ETF Makes History in Wild Wall Street Debut!

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Oy vey, have I got news for you! 🎭 The financial world is going absolutely meshugge as the first XRP ETF is about to hit Wall Street tomorrow like my mother-in-law hits the buffet table – with unstoppable force! This little puppy, called XXRP (sounds like a restricted movie rating, am I right? 😏), is promising to double your money faster than I can say “May the Schwartz be with you!”

And get this – there’s a whole lineup of other crypto ETFs waiting in the wings, like they’re auditioning for a Broadway show! The SEC is sitting there like a tough critic, probably mumbling “Next!” after each application. Solana’s in there too, trying to schmooze its way to approval! 🎭

Speaking of drama, remember that Ripple legal saga? Oy, it went on longer than one of my movie productions! They finally settled for $50 million – that’s what I call an expensive bar mitzvah! 💸

What a difference four years makes. Around this time, 4 years ago, I was filing a Motion to Intervene into the @Ripple case, asking Judge Torres to allow a putative class of XRP holders to become actual defendants in the case. Most lawyers laughed at my motion, although, tbh, I…

— John E Deaton (@JohnEDeaton1) April 7, 2025

And here’s our hero, John Deaton – picture this: A lawyer walks into a courtroom (sounds like the beginning of a joke, right? 🤡). Everyone’s laughing at him like he just showed up in suspenders and a propeller beanie. But who’s laughing now, bubbeleh? He turned that courtroom into his personal theater, and boy, did he put on a show! 🎪

As he puts it – and I’m paraphrasing here – “Those fancy-schmancy lawyers were giggling like schoolgirls at my motion. But did I care? Like a mohel cares about manicures!” 😂

And now? We’ve got more XRP ETFs than I’ve got one-liners! It’s like watching “Springtime for Crypto” on Wall Street! Remember folks, in the words of the great John Deaton (and slightly tweaked by yours truly): “Never say you can’t make a difference… unless you’re trying to convince my wife to stop shopping!” 🎬

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2025-04-08 07:52