💰 Crypto IPO: Wild Ride or Fool’s Gold? 🤪

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Hark! A most curious spectacle unfolds upon the bustling stage of the New York Exchange! Tom Farley, a gentleman formerly presiding over matters of commerce, now steers a vessel named Bullish, and lo, it hath achieved a rather… remarkable debut. One might almost suspect a touch of sorcery!

This Bullish, you see, is nurtured by a certain Peter Thiel – a man of means and, shall we say, particular tastes – and joins a growing throng of these “crypto” concerns seeking legitimacy amongst the more… established financial houses. A most unsettling trend, I assure you! 🧐

A Grand Entrance

But let us not dwell on the unsettling! Earlier this week, this same Bullish, with a flourish most theatrical, did ring the bell of the aforementioned Exchange, thus announcing its arrival as a publicly traded entity, proclaimed ‘BLSH’ to all and sundry. A rather ungainly title, if I may be so bold.

The price commenced at a rather respectable ninety dollars, then dared to soar to a dizzying one hundred and eighteen! But, alas, like Icarus, it descended once more, settling at a more modest sixty-eight – as the Oracle of Google Finance doth inform us. Such volatility! One fears for one’s wig!

They *intended* to ask for twenty-eight to thirty dollars a share – a pittance! – yet the rabble clamored for it at a price nearly two hundred percent higher! A success, they proclaim. I say, more a testament to the folly of man! They amassed a tidy sum of eleven hundred million, when they were hoping for… well, significantly less. A most fortunate turn of events, wouldn’t you agree? 😜

Bullish now stands amongst other newly public trading houses, such as eToro, who ventured forth in May with a valuation of a mere four billion two hundred thousand. A paltry sum compared to the riches now on display.

And let us not forget Coinbase, the first of its kind to brave the NASDAQ, arriving with a valuation of eighty-five billion eight hundred thousand! Truly, a kingdom built on… digital snippets.

This favorable reception, one suspects, is due to certain… lenient pronouncements issuing from the White House, coupled with a peculiar, nay, unwarranted confidence among investors and institutions. And naturally, a flood of funds chasing these ephemeral “crypto-assets”. Oh, the vanity of it all! 🎭

Fellow Travellers in the Public Square

’Tis not merely exchanges that seek favor with the public purse. Even those who dig for these “bitcoins” – BitFuFu, to be precise – have joined the NASDAQ, valued at one and a half billion. A curious profession, to be sure.

And Circle, purveyors of these “stablecoins”, have likewise been blessed with a billion and one hundred million, earning a valuation of six billion nine hundred thousand. Though what precisely is “stable” about a coin built on such shifting sands, remains a mystery to this humble observer. 🤨

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2025-08-15 07:07